An eternity passed as she stared at the cold grey slab of metal before her. It was sturdy, the table in front of her; plain and functional. Four non-descript straight legs and the cold steel grey top. Nothing unusual the eye could see but the mind filled in the blanks. In the mind the table became a river raging through thoughts and memories, carrying them into one melting pool of time.
They were hers… of that she was certain. Nothing so vivid could belong to anyone else, or be pulled from the depths of imagination. Fighting to survive under the most impossible of situations, finding hope where the was none. Hours spent haunting the sky chasing phantoms as they tore holes through her reality.
She remembered with vivid clarity when they first took her, the hospital on Caprica where they carved her open and twisted her mind. Months later on New Caprica where her spirit was more captive than her body in the dollhouse of a prison he'd built to break her down. And he had.
Every tear, every heartbreak she wasn't allowed to feel because she was too strong, had to be the leader, had to hold up the image… They all raced past in the flow of the stream, tainted by crimson droplets that fell from an accidental yet unattended split lip.
The child she never knew she wanted, not hers, torn from her arms along with what was left of her soul. Drowning the sorrow and trying to patch the pieces of what was left with the bitter burn of sweet alcohol. Hitting that place of absolute nothingness and starting to rebuild the facade that would mask the depths of despair to everyone around once more.
The revelation, resolution; letting all the madness boil over and drift away until she could accept the fate that wasn't to be hers after all… Coming home.
Over and over each detail danced across the tabletop that flowed across the tabletop before her, drifting on a stream only she could see as his voice echoed in her ears and in her mind. He'd always known, always understood when no one else could even grasp. She understood why know… it was all in the stream, He was her, she was him, their experiences shared like two halves of the same spirit.
The artificial hiss of hydraulics forcing open the metallic hatch wasn't enough to draw her out of the stream, to make her look up, nor were the approaching footsteps, steady yet favored… the injury not yet healed. Even the folder dropping tot he table before her with an audible slap on the water's surface didn't bring her head up.
A heartbeat, maybe two longer her eyes lingered on the the thick metal cuffs that bound her wrists, the chain that looped secure through matching cuffs on her ankles. It was time to begin again. With a smile that was calm, almost pleased she began to lift her head, taking in first the hands that rested on the table. Hands she knew as well as her own, hands that had guided hers through a long, haggard path to find her destiny, touched her in ways only her soul could grasp, leaving her body crying, aching for more.
Beyond the hands she could see the the cuffs of the uniform jacket. So familiar yet so foreign now… had she once worn one just like it?
Finally she gifted herself with looking up into eyes of steel blue, tired eyes on a rugged, handsome face.. Every detail was as she remembered, and the glimmer of shock in his eyes said he remembered too, though it was still buried deep. Her smile quirked at the tousled short blonde hair even the military couldn't hope to tame… Even the impatience in his face mirrored what was once her own.
The impatient tapping of the pen on the folder came to an abrupt halt, when she finally spoke. Just three simple words would start everything that had already begun again, maybe this time they would get it right…
"I remember you…"
Monday, January 4, 2010
(untitled) - Start of another crossover
((Another victim of writer's block, would still like to see where this one goes one day))
"Galactica, Starbuck," The pilot spoke though the microphone inside her headset. "I'm picking up an abnormal reading bearing 127,39 karom 4, request permission for closer scan." the CAP had been the standard very dull routine that it had become since the truce. She'd been one of the few to argue it was still necessary as many had just fallen into a sense of security surrounding the whole thing. Her main reason had been it kept her flying.
"Copy Starbuck, we're not picking up anything from this range, permission to take a closer look granted." Came back the crackled reply.
"Copy that Galactica, Starbuck out." It was obvious they were humoring her, nothing of any significance had been turned up the last five times she'd thought she saw something. Likely they hadn't even looked.
Shrugging the thought off she angled off fro the fleet to go investigate the faint blip on her dradis, setting a direct heading. As she approached, the blip remained weak but constant. "Galactica, Starbuck, looks to be a glitch in the dradis system. There's nothing here..." There was nothing but static on the comm, though she was sure she'd not moved out of comm range... likely a short in the helmet system, again.
She moved just a little further out, to see if the signal changed, intending on turning back when the small craft was seemingly jerked from the spot it had been, lurching sideways through what felt like an extended FTL jump.
The viper jerked to a stop, throwing her against the canopy, descending her into blackness as she lost consciousness from the impact.
She didn't have time to determine how much time had passed when the radiological alarms on the console kicked in full force. The display indicated a massive radioactive concentration just ahead, and she looked up to see the most grotesque ship she had ever come across.
Nothing she had ever seen could even come close, cylon or human. It was big, battered, looked like it had been patched together from a dozen other ships. That was the pleasant part, what wasn't so pleasant was the fact it was reading as a giant mass of radioactivity, and had what looked like scorched skeletons strapped along its hull like trophies.
Before the shock of seeing it passed and she cold bank away, a thin harpoon on a chain shattered through the canopy, impaling her shoulder and pinning her to the seat. Had she been sitting straight it would have gone straight through her chest. "Son of a frakkin bitch!:" She hissed out, taking hold of the flight stick. Arming the two heat seekers the viper carried, she released them at the ship. No way in hell was something like that going to take her without a fight.
The explosion tore the ship into a hundred pieces, sending the viper end over end. The tear in her flight suit would burn up the oxygen in her reserve pack in a matter of minutes, she might be able to buy a few more if she could path the canopy with something and get its life support online.
Resigned to the fact it would likely do little good, she flicked on the distress beacon and closed her eyes, floating among the rubble of the other ship.
"Galactica, Starbuck," The pilot spoke though the microphone inside her headset. "I'm picking up an abnormal reading bearing 127,39 karom 4, request permission for closer scan." the CAP had been the standard very dull routine that it had become since the truce. She'd been one of the few to argue it was still necessary as many had just fallen into a sense of security surrounding the whole thing. Her main reason had been it kept her flying.
"Copy Starbuck, we're not picking up anything from this range, permission to take a closer look granted." Came back the crackled reply.
"Copy that Galactica, Starbuck out." It was obvious they were humoring her, nothing of any significance had been turned up the last five times she'd thought she saw something. Likely they hadn't even looked.
Shrugging the thought off she angled off fro the fleet to go investigate the faint blip on her dradis, setting a direct heading. As she approached, the blip remained weak but constant. "Galactica, Starbuck, looks to be a glitch in the dradis system. There's nothing here..." There was nothing but static on the comm, though she was sure she'd not moved out of comm range... likely a short in the helmet system, again.
She moved just a little further out, to see if the signal changed, intending on turning back when the small craft was seemingly jerked from the spot it had been, lurching sideways through what felt like an extended FTL jump.
The viper jerked to a stop, throwing her against the canopy, descending her into blackness as she lost consciousness from the impact.
She didn't have time to determine how much time had passed when the radiological alarms on the console kicked in full force. The display indicated a massive radioactive concentration just ahead, and she looked up to see the most grotesque ship she had ever come across.
Nothing she had ever seen could even come close, cylon or human. It was big, battered, looked like it had been patched together from a dozen other ships. That was the pleasant part, what wasn't so pleasant was the fact it was reading as a giant mass of radioactivity, and had what looked like scorched skeletons strapped along its hull like trophies.
Before the shock of seeing it passed and she cold bank away, a thin harpoon on a chain shattered through the canopy, impaling her shoulder and pinning her to the seat. Had she been sitting straight it would have gone straight through her chest. "Son of a frakkin bitch!:" She hissed out, taking hold of the flight stick. Arming the two heat seekers the viper carried, she released them at the ship. No way in hell was something like that going to take her without a fight.
The explosion tore the ship into a hundred pieces, sending the viper end over end. The tear in her flight suit would burn up the oxygen in her reserve pack in a matter of minutes, she might be able to buy a few more if she could path the canopy with something and get its life support online.
Resigned to the fact it would likely do little good, she flicked on the distress beacon and closed her eyes, floating among the rubble of the other ship.
Wings Across the Sky - Chapter 4/4 - Unfinished
“Just tell me what you want from Inara.” If Mal had known how far his voice would carry from the quiet bridge through the mostly silent ship, he wouldn’t have said a single word to the Companion when she stepped into the bridge. He was on watch, like he was most nights. Sleep wasn’t his friend anymore. Too many bad dreams mingled with worse memories.
“I just want to know how long this layover is going to be Mal. I have an appointment on Persephone, and for once I’d like to not be late.” Her lips were painted the same swollen berry red that they’d been the first time he’d seen her when she’d come to rent his shuttle.
“We’ll be there in plenty of time. Ath, will be able to get his jollies right on schedule. We’re in good shape and makin’ good time. Ain’t nothin’ wrong with Serenity for a change.” When she’d left him, them, he’d missed her every single day and night, but now he was wishing that she’d never agreed to stay on board. He had made her a whore this time. It wasn’t the Guild that he could blame.
“It’s not what’s wrong with Serenity that has me concerned Mal. I’m worried about you.”
“Well don’t be. Let’s make a deal,” his voice went cold as his eye turned to ice. “You don’t want me walkin’ into your shuttle unannounced, how ‘bout you stop comin’ on my bridge whenever you feel like bein’ a nag.”
“Fine!” Inara took a step back, and Mal fought the urge to say he was sorry. He shoved the concern back under the anger. Her feet made barely a sound as she raced back to her shuttle. “I won’t bother you any longer Captain Reynolds.”
“Good!” He picked up his coffee cup and took a long drink before he realized how cold and nasty it had gotten. With a frown he stomped on down through to the kitchen to get a refill.
“You need to stop doing that sir,” Zoë said from behind the counter where she was getting her own cup of what passed for coffee on Serenity.
“Please Zoë; I’ve already gotten into one fight tonight. Don’t want to get into one with you too.” He passed her his old blue cup and watched her fill it instead of making eye contact. He felt like a heel for the way he’d treated Inara.
“Why don’t you tell her the truth Mal.” That caught his attention. Zoë never used his name unless she meant for him to listen. “I lost Wash in a blink of my eyes. We thought we were safe, and then he was dead. She’s left you once. Why can’t you admit that you love her?”
“It wouldn’t do me any good if I did. I ain’t good enough for her Zoë, and I never will be. Any chance we had died when she went back to work.”
“But she did it to help us.”
“That’s what makes it worse, don’t you see?” Mal scrubbed at his face. “When she did it for her callin’, she was a companion. She does it now to make sure we’re never as desperate for money as we were when she was gone. I’ve made her a whore Zoë. I’ve ruined Inara, like I’ve ruined everything else I’ve ever loved.”
“You didn’t ruin Serenity Sir,” Zoë said as she reached over and squeezed his hand. “And you didn’t ruin me or River or Kaylee. Notice I only mention those of us you do love. You’ve got no responsibility when it comes to how fucked up Jayne is. He came that way.”
An alarm went off before Mal could say another word; he dropped his cup in the sink and raced back through the ship to the bridge. The ship rocked as a low powered shot hit them. Checking the scanners, Mal sent out a long string of curses as he answered the wave that was chiming in.
“Serenity, this is Alliance Captain Milton of the Starship Destiny. Prepare to be boarded and your cargo seized.”
((Hoping one day will find the thread to finish this one))
“I just want to know how long this layover is going to be Mal. I have an appointment on Persephone, and for once I’d like to not be late.” Her lips were painted the same swollen berry red that they’d been the first time he’d seen her when she’d come to rent his shuttle.
“We’ll be there in plenty of time. Ath, will be able to get his jollies right on schedule. We’re in good shape and makin’ good time. Ain’t nothin’ wrong with Serenity for a change.” When she’d left him, them, he’d missed her every single day and night, but now he was wishing that she’d never agreed to stay on board. He had made her a whore this time. It wasn’t the Guild that he could blame.
“It’s not what’s wrong with Serenity that has me concerned Mal. I’m worried about you.”
“Well don’t be. Let’s make a deal,” his voice went cold as his eye turned to ice. “You don’t want me walkin’ into your shuttle unannounced, how ‘bout you stop comin’ on my bridge whenever you feel like bein’ a nag.”
“Fine!” Inara took a step back, and Mal fought the urge to say he was sorry. He shoved the concern back under the anger. Her feet made barely a sound as she raced back to her shuttle. “I won’t bother you any longer Captain Reynolds.”
“Good!” He picked up his coffee cup and took a long drink before he realized how cold and nasty it had gotten. With a frown he stomped on down through to the kitchen to get a refill.
“You need to stop doing that sir,” Zoë said from behind the counter where she was getting her own cup of what passed for coffee on Serenity.
“Please Zoë; I’ve already gotten into one fight tonight. Don’t want to get into one with you too.” He passed her his old blue cup and watched her fill it instead of making eye contact. He felt like a heel for the way he’d treated Inara.
“Why don’t you tell her the truth Mal.” That caught his attention. Zoë never used his name unless she meant for him to listen. “I lost Wash in a blink of my eyes. We thought we were safe, and then he was dead. She’s left you once. Why can’t you admit that you love her?”
“It wouldn’t do me any good if I did. I ain’t good enough for her Zoë, and I never will be. Any chance we had died when she went back to work.”
“But she did it to help us.”
“That’s what makes it worse, don’t you see?” Mal scrubbed at his face. “When she did it for her callin’, she was a companion. She does it now to make sure we’re never as desperate for money as we were when she was gone. I’ve made her a whore Zoë. I’ve ruined Inara, like I’ve ruined everything else I’ve ever loved.”
“You didn’t ruin Serenity Sir,” Zoë said as she reached over and squeezed his hand. “And you didn’t ruin me or River or Kaylee. Notice I only mention those of us you do love. You’ve got no responsibility when it comes to how fucked up Jayne is. He came that way.”
An alarm went off before Mal could say another word; he dropped his cup in the sink and raced back through the ship to the bridge. The ship rocked as a low powered shot hit them. Checking the scanners, Mal sent out a long string of curses as he answered the wave that was chiming in.
“Serenity, this is Alliance Captain Milton of the Starship Destiny. Prepare to be boarded and your cargo seized.”
((Hoping one day will find the thread to finish this one))
Wings Across the Sky - Chapter 3/4 - Unfinished
The room she'd beens shown to was small by most standards, but it was far more space than she was used to. Life in the fleet had been pretty much living in one another's back pockets, and on Lilac it had been worse. Not enough shelter or supplies to go around meant overcrowding and general misery.
She'd not even hesitated once Zoe had left her, grabbing a relatively clean change of clothes she'd kept packed in the bottom of her duffle since landing on that desolate rock. She filled the small washbasin, stripped off her dust encrusted shirt and proceeded to wash away what she could of the dirt that clung to her skin. Never did she think she would be so appreciative of freshly recycled water.
The engines of the ship firing up made the deck plates tremble, the water in the sink rippling rapidly. A sigh of relief met the sound as she closed her eyes. She was finally going to be free of here.
Changed and feeling considerably cleaner, she eventually made her way to the lower common area near the passenger berths. Up several winding metal staircases she eventually found the common dining room, which was painted an abnormally cheerful yellow. What caught her eye most was when she looked up, the stars now visible through the high windows.
She'd been sure to stay back out of the way, just letting herself get lost in the view as they left the atmosphere completely, leaving the dustball behind.
***
After two days on board, she was wishin like hell she had forever to stay, but with each passing day they got closer to Persephone where she'd be parting ways with the crew. It wasn't as though she'd made close friends with them, but they were for the most part pleasant with her.
The Captain, he kept to himself, she mostly only saw him at mealtime. He was deeply troubled by something. He spoke little and hung around even less. What was more telling were the looks the crew would exchange among themselves when he'd leave. There was definitely something going on that had him troubled.
In her mind she'd dubbed Kaylee the ambassador of cheerfulness. She was pretty sure nothing could bring that girl down. And at times it was infectious…. She'd seen it in action at the dinner-table, The girl could even make Captain Reynolds smile.
It didn't take a rocket scientist to see Kaylee was sweet on the ship's doctor, Simon. Somon seemed to manage his time well between his sweetheart and his younger sister River, who was nothing but an enigma to Kara.
Zoe was one Kara understood, in fact she was much a mirror image of herself. Career military, fiercely loyal to her captain, and recently widowed… They'd traded stories the night before over a bottle of weak whiskey. It was badly watered down but neither acknowledged. It made it easier to talk, pretending it was the whiskey doing the talking. All things considered, it was a good thing the whiskey had been watered down to nothing but flavor, otherwise they would both have very large painful heads today.
However, the bonding with the first mate may never had happened had it not been for Jayne.
It turned out Janye was the epitome if big dumb muscle. It hadn't mattered in the least how often she'd told him she wasn't the least bit interested in his gun collection, he still insisted. He would just not let it go. Sure as she was he really did have quite a collection, no way in hell was she going down into his bunk to see it.
Add that to the constant harassment he dished out upon the other women on the ship… She was pretty sure she'd seen Captain Reynolds throw him a warning glare or two over dinner the night before. He was pretty much everything she disliked in a man.
That made it pretty easy when he'd finally cornered her. He towered over her by a good foot in height, and he'd definitely had a drink or two, it was all you could smell on him. Likely thought it would give him the courage to push her just a little. She'd never worried he would push to far, he was dumb, not a creep. She just needed to give him a lesson that was on his level. A lesson that wound up with him kissing carpet, his wrist making friendly with his shoulder blades and a rather heavy boot holding his head still.
She'd let him up right away and he got up, looking a little wounded as he stated simply. "Gorramit woman, coulda just said no…" What followed was the first time Kara had seen Zoe smile. She'd later find out it was because that moment made her think of her late husband, as he was always amused when Jayne got put in his place by a woman.
That left just one other person on the crew for her to really meet. Inara. She'd seen the woman several times, though usually it was after Inara had been talking to the Captain, which always seemed to put her in a foul mood and she'd disappear for hours. Kaylee had once tried to explain that Inara was a companion and the Captain didn't much like it, though kara hadn't bothered to ask what exactly a companion was. The name pretty much put some ideas in her head as to what it entailed.
It was late, everyone had long since retired to their bunks, so she did the same. As she lay on her bunk she could hear the faint creak and groan of the metal hull. The low hum of the engines as the small ship coasted through space.
Tomorrow would be a long day. They had a stop to make, so she'd been told, ships business… Which, just being a passenger didn't concern her at all. So why the hell did the thought bother her so much?
She'd not even hesitated once Zoe had left her, grabbing a relatively clean change of clothes she'd kept packed in the bottom of her duffle since landing on that desolate rock. She filled the small washbasin, stripped off her dust encrusted shirt and proceeded to wash away what she could of the dirt that clung to her skin. Never did she think she would be so appreciative of freshly recycled water.
The engines of the ship firing up made the deck plates tremble, the water in the sink rippling rapidly. A sigh of relief met the sound as she closed her eyes. She was finally going to be free of here.
Changed and feeling considerably cleaner, she eventually made her way to the lower common area near the passenger berths. Up several winding metal staircases she eventually found the common dining room, which was painted an abnormally cheerful yellow. What caught her eye most was when she looked up, the stars now visible through the high windows.
She'd been sure to stay back out of the way, just letting herself get lost in the view as they left the atmosphere completely, leaving the dustball behind.
***
After two days on board, she was wishin like hell she had forever to stay, but with each passing day they got closer to Persephone where she'd be parting ways with the crew. It wasn't as though she'd made close friends with them, but they were for the most part pleasant with her.
The Captain, he kept to himself, she mostly only saw him at mealtime. He was deeply troubled by something. He spoke little and hung around even less. What was more telling were the looks the crew would exchange among themselves when he'd leave. There was definitely something going on that had him troubled.
In her mind she'd dubbed Kaylee the ambassador of cheerfulness. She was pretty sure nothing could bring that girl down. And at times it was infectious…. She'd seen it in action at the dinner-table, The girl could even make Captain Reynolds smile.
It didn't take a rocket scientist to see Kaylee was sweet on the ship's doctor, Simon. Somon seemed to manage his time well between his sweetheart and his younger sister River, who was nothing but an enigma to Kara.
Zoe was one Kara understood, in fact she was much a mirror image of herself. Career military, fiercely loyal to her captain, and recently widowed… They'd traded stories the night before over a bottle of weak whiskey. It was badly watered down but neither acknowledged. It made it easier to talk, pretending it was the whiskey doing the talking. All things considered, it was a good thing the whiskey had been watered down to nothing but flavor, otherwise they would both have very large painful heads today.
However, the bonding with the first mate may never had happened had it not been for Jayne.
It turned out Janye was the epitome if big dumb muscle. It hadn't mattered in the least how often she'd told him she wasn't the least bit interested in his gun collection, he still insisted. He would just not let it go. Sure as she was he really did have quite a collection, no way in hell was she going down into his bunk to see it.
Add that to the constant harassment he dished out upon the other women on the ship… She was pretty sure she'd seen Captain Reynolds throw him a warning glare or two over dinner the night before. He was pretty much everything she disliked in a man.
That made it pretty easy when he'd finally cornered her. He towered over her by a good foot in height, and he'd definitely had a drink or two, it was all you could smell on him. Likely thought it would give him the courage to push her just a little. She'd never worried he would push to far, he was dumb, not a creep. She just needed to give him a lesson that was on his level. A lesson that wound up with him kissing carpet, his wrist making friendly with his shoulder blades and a rather heavy boot holding his head still.
She'd let him up right away and he got up, looking a little wounded as he stated simply. "Gorramit woman, coulda just said no…" What followed was the first time Kara had seen Zoe smile. She'd later find out it was because that moment made her think of her late husband, as he was always amused when Jayne got put in his place by a woman.
That left just one other person on the crew for her to really meet. Inara. She'd seen the woman several times, though usually it was after Inara had been talking to the Captain, which always seemed to put her in a foul mood and she'd disappear for hours. Kaylee had once tried to explain that Inara was a companion and the Captain didn't much like it, though kara hadn't bothered to ask what exactly a companion was. The name pretty much put some ideas in her head as to what it entailed.
It was late, everyone had long since retired to their bunks, so she did the same. As she lay on her bunk she could hear the faint creak and groan of the metal hull. The low hum of the engines as the small ship coasted through space.
Tomorrow would be a long day. They had a stop to make, so she'd been told, ships business… Which, just being a passenger didn't concern her at all. So why the hell did the thought bother her so much?
Wings Across the Sky - Chapter 2/4 - Unfinished
When the call had come in about the job, an actual mostly legal job, Mal had been happy about catching the Wave. But the happy lasted only as long as it took for Zoe to tell him where the job was. A dry swallow ate the name Lilac, and he shoved it down into his gut with all the rest of his guilt and regrets.
“Captain?” Kaylee rocked on the toes of her boots beside him, a bright smile on her face. They both watched as the ramp lowered onto the dust bowl moon that was all the Reavers had left behind. “You all right?”
“Ain’t nothin’ wrong with me,” he said as he tugged on his gloves. “Make sure we’re ready to go soon as they get their cargo. Don’t want to spend anymore time here as we have to.”
“Don’t worry. Jayne an’ I’ll handle it. Where are you goin’?” her dark eyes filled with concern as Mal started walking down the ramp.
“Need to see a man ‘bout a mule,” was Mal’s bitter reply. The sun was brilliant, and not for the first time he wished that he wore a hat to shade his eyes. Serenity had landed near the new settlement where the Colonial refugees had made their home, but it wasn’t too terribly far from the old settlement where he and a trio of his crew were the last people to walk out on their own.
Even through the thick patina of dust and grime, he could still see the battle scars from the Reaver weapons on the walls of the surviving buildings. Here and there were the brown stains of the blood of the fallen. The Alliance had done a shiny job of hiding what had happened, but Malcolm Reynolds knew better he’d been there.
He stopped in front of the bar where he’d shot a man who’d been begging him for help. He’d called it a kindness to justify what he’d done, but that kindness was churning in his belly like a snake made out of broken glass.
“I’m sorry,” he said as the wind tore the words from his lips, drying the tear that slid down from one blue eye. “Should’ve taken the chance. Won’t forget what I done to you. I ain’t never goin’ to leave another soul behind that wants away from this or anyplace long as I can get to the Black.”
Reaching into his pocket, he drew out a pair of silver coins. Hunkering down on his heels, Mal scooped out a few inches of dusty soil and buried the twin coins. “They used to put coins on the eyes of the dead. This is the best I can do for you and yours.”
By the time he walked back to Serenity, he was more than ready to leave. Then she came asking for passage. It was almost as if he’d been the one who could read the future and not the little Albatross. He looked at the coins he’d been given by Kara Thrace, wasn’t nearly enough to get her off of any normal piss hole planet. He’d have tried to up the ante, see what else he could get from her.
But not on Lilac. Any amount of change was good enough on Lilac.
###
The cargo bay was empty when he prepped Serenity to break atmo. It’d be a good long time before the colonists had anything to trade to the outside world. For now all they had was money. Mal hoped that the seeds they’d brought would help them make something out of the place.
“There are worse planets,” Jayne said as he stomped onto the bridge. “Least there ain’t no more Reavers.”
“There are still Reavers, Jayne,” Mal answered as he started flipping switches along Wash’s station. It would always be Wash’s station, no matter how long Mal was filling in as pilot. Even if he hired a new one, they’d be told to use the co-pilot’s. ‘They just ain’t all covered in skin and piercings. Some of ‘em just work for the Feds is all. Our passenger all settled? I want off of this piece of shit now.”
“Think so. Zoe’s doin’ the tour.” The big mercenary rubbed at the back of his neck and shrugged. “She’s pretty.”
“Zoe?” Mal’s thought he heard Wash’s voice scream in his head that Jayne was NEVER to say that he thought Zoe was pretty. But then again, it might have been his own voice. “Yeah, Jayne Zoe’s pretty, but don’t tell her that. She’ll get a big head.”
“No, not Zoe Mal. The passenger. She’s pretty.”
“Didn’t notice,” Mal said with not a small amount of relief. The last thing he wanted was to watch Jayne get some kind of insane crush on Zoe. She was still hurt. She tried to hide it, but Mal knew her better than he knew himself. “All I noticed was her money was good.”
Wasn’t really all he’d noticed. But he didn’t really want to warn Jayne that Kara Thrace looked like she could kick the shit out of him just as easily as Zoe could. Where would the fun be in that?
“I’ll tell ‘em we’re leavin’ then.”
“You do that,” Mal said as he sat down in Wash’s seat. He waited until the sound of Jayne’s boots stopped echoing down the passageway, and started up Serenity’s engines. With his eyes closed, he listened to the rough thrum of the engine turning, and waited until he heard the sweet sound of her settling in. That was when it was time for lift off, not before. The take off was smooth as one of Inara’s silk dresses. “Well now, seems I’m gettin’ pretty good at this.”
“Thankfully,” Inara said as they broke into the Black. The stars in the sky nearly as bright as the sparkling jewels she’d woven into her hair. “But you do need to work on the landings. I still need to replace one of my tea sets.”
“I’m sure y’all make enough to replace it Inara.” He glanced back at her. She was dressed for work. A job he’d hoped she wouldn’t go back to, but it was the only way she knew. At least she was out there with them, and not at the temple teaching new girls. But with them, was never going to be the same as with him, and he knew it. “Picked up a passenger. Why don’t you go say hello?”
“Captain?” Kaylee rocked on the toes of her boots beside him, a bright smile on her face. They both watched as the ramp lowered onto the dust bowl moon that was all the Reavers had left behind. “You all right?”
“Ain’t nothin’ wrong with me,” he said as he tugged on his gloves. “Make sure we’re ready to go soon as they get their cargo. Don’t want to spend anymore time here as we have to.”
“Don’t worry. Jayne an’ I’ll handle it. Where are you goin’?” her dark eyes filled with concern as Mal started walking down the ramp.
“Need to see a man ‘bout a mule,” was Mal’s bitter reply. The sun was brilliant, and not for the first time he wished that he wore a hat to shade his eyes. Serenity had landed near the new settlement where the Colonial refugees had made their home, but it wasn’t too terribly far from the old settlement where he and a trio of his crew were the last people to walk out on their own.
Even through the thick patina of dust and grime, he could still see the battle scars from the Reaver weapons on the walls of the surviving buildings. Here and there were the brown stains of the blood of the fallen. The Alliance had done a shiny job of hiding what had happened, but Malcolm Reynolds knew better he’d been there.
He stopped in front of the bar where he’d shot a man who’d been begging him for help. He’d called it a kindness to justify what he’d done, but that kindness was churning in his belly like a snake made out of broken glass.
“I’m sorry,” he said as the wind tore the words from his lips, drying the tear that slid down from one blue eye. “Should’ve taken the chance. Won’t forget what I done to you. I ain’t never goin’ to leave another soul behind that wants away from this or anyplace long as I can get to the Black.”
Reaching into his pocket, he drew out a pair of silver coins. Hunkering down on his heels, Mal scooped out a few inches of dusty soil and buried the twin coins. “They used to put coins on the eyes of the dead. This is the best I can do for you and yours.”
By the time he walked back to Serenity, he was more than ready to leave. Then she came asking for passage. It was almost as if he’d been the one who could read the future and not the little Albatross. He looked at the coins he’d been given by Kara Thrace, wasn’t nearly enough to get her off of any normal piss hole planet. He’d have tried to up the ante, see what else he could get from her.
But not on Lilac. Any amount of change was good enough on Lilac.
###
The cargo bay was empty when he prepped Serenity to break atmo. It’d be a good long time before the colonists had anything to trade to the outside world. For now all they had was money. Mal hoped that the seeds they’d brought would help them make something out of the place.
“There are worse planets,” Jayne said as he stomped onto the bridge. “Least there ain’t no more Reavers.”
“There are still Reavers, Jayne,” Mal answered as he started flipping switches along Wash’s station. It would always be Wash’s station, no matter how long Mal was filling in as pilot. Even if he hired a new one, they’d be told to use the co-pilot’s. ‘They just ain’t all covered in skin and piercings. Some of ‘em just work for the Feds is all. Our passenger all settled? I want off of this piece of shit now.”
“Think so. Zoe’s doin’ the tour.” The big mercenary rubbed at the back of his neck and shrugged. “She’s pretty.”
“Zoe?” Mal’s thought he heard Wash’s voice scream in his head that Jayne was NEVER to say that he thought Zoe was pretty. But then again, it might have been his own voice. “Yeah, Jayne Zoe’s pretty, but don’t tell her that. She’ll get a big head.”
“No, not Zoe Mal. The passenger. She’s pretty.”
“Didn’t notice,” Mal said with not a small amount of relief. The last thing he wanted was to watch Jayne get some kind of insane crush on Zoe. She was still hurt. She tried to hide it, but Mal knew her better than he knew himself. “All I noticed was her money was good.”
Wasn’t really all he’d noticed. But he didn’t really want to warn Jayne that Kara Thrace looked like she could kick the shit out of him just as easily as Zoe could. Where would the fun be in that?
“I’ll tell ‘em we’re leavin’ then.”
“You do that,” Mal said as he sat down in Wash’s seat. He waited until the sound of Jayne’s boots stopped echoing down the passageway, and started up Serenity’s engines. With his eyes closed, he listened to the rough thrum of the engine turning, and waited until he heard the sweet sound of her settling in. That was when it was time for lift off, not before. The take off was smooth as one of Inara’s silk dresses. “Well now, seems I’m gettin’ pretty good at this.”
“Thankfully,” Inara said as they broke into the Black. The stars in the sky nearly as bright as the sparkling jewels she’d woven into her hair. “But you do need to work on the landings. I still need to replace one of my tea sets.”
“I’m sure y’all make enough to replace it Inara.” He glanced back at her. She was dressed for work. A job he’d hoped she wouldn’t go back to, but it was the only way she knew. At least she was out there with them, and not at the temple teaching new girls. But with them, was never going to be the same as with him, and he knew it. “Picked up a passenger. Why don’t you go say hello?”
Wings Across the Sky - Chapter 1/4 - Unfinished
((Another I started working on with a friend, unfortunately bad writer's block stalled it indefinitely, and I have since lost touch with the friend, who knows if it will ever be finished))
The dust whipped around, biting at any exposed skin, stinging eyes and making breathing difficult. The cloud was so thick one could barely see the metallic bulk responsible for it settle to the ground. Nine months on this desolate rock and this was only the second transport ship to bring supplies. The first had been two days after they'd arrived. Basic food supplies, crop seeds, theoretically enough to get them settled. Not everyone was thrilled with the idea of farming, but they were alive. If you could call this dust ball living, it made New Caprica look downright inviting, and all things considered, that was not saying much at all.
What was worst was what they took. Most of the ships had been barely flight worthy, and coming into the atmosphere had done nothing to help that, so they'd become permanent fixtures on the ground, serving as homes and shelters against the unforgiving climate. The ships that had still been air worthy had been taken, apparently to be returned sometime later, but Galactica and the crew that had remained on board hadn't been seen or heard from since.
Zarek had assumed leadership. It was frakked up all to hell but he did look out for the people, and he sure the hell couldn't do worse than Baltar had. Hell had he been in charge at the time the Alliance encountered them maybe they would have found a better rock to dump them on. One that hadn't already been wiped out before. A scouting party had found the abandoned settlement the same afternoon the transport had dropped off supplies. The signs of struggle were evident but not a trace of who had been there before remained. Orders had been to scavenge everything they could and keep quiet. They'd established their own settlement several miles from where the other had been. Those who knew of the ghost town decided it best not to mention, things were dire enough without a panicked population.
They'd had no contact from the Alliance since. No supplies, no word… hell who knew if they were even still out there. The few thousand that remained went about setting up a new life, though sickness had claimed so many over the winder that had passed. Now there were less than twenty five thousand, and I was beginning to look like they'd just been left out here to die.
Then things had changed, word came about the transport arriving and there was a spark of hope among the colonials once again. Kara wasn't really sure how Zarek had managed it, but there was now a transport touching down with much needed medical supplies, food, and whatever else they were able to scrounge together. What was on the transport, she really wasn't interested, what she was looking for was a way out.
As the transaction took place, money and goods changing hands, she hung back, just observing the crew. Her hand settled over her pocket, a pouch of coins tucked inside. Coins she'd scavenged from those burned out buildings on that first scouting trip so many months ago. Most they'd turned over to the government, but Kara had tucked away a portion of whatever she found for herself. She'd been planning even then to find a way to buy passage away from here, away from everything. She just hadn't expected it to be so long in coming.
The dust had settled, and the supplies were being hauled back towards the settlement when she approached the ship. The man she assumed was Captain was looking out over the filed towards the old settlement, his expression almost haunted. He turned to Kara as she approached, eyebrow slightly raised in curiosity, though it would have been hard for a trained soldier to miss the slight flinch in his hand, prepared to go for his gun should he need to.. He was obviously used to things going bad.
"You take on passengers? I can pay…" She called out as she approached. At the mention of money his posture shifted, far more welcoming than before, some of the defensive stance gone.
"Depends, where you're intent on traveling to, we don't tend to go into toe core none to often."
"Suits me fine, just want off this rock, get somewhere I can find work." She pulled one of the small bag of coins from her pocket, tossing it to him." To be honest I've no idea how far that will get me, but we haven't got much here…"
His expression stayed mostly neutral, he'd have made a good gambler, as he looked at the contents of the bag. "Well, if you don't mind making a few little stops along the way, we can get you to persephone inside of a fortnight."
"Suits me fine…" She smiled a little, the prospect of getting off the rock finally making her feel a little bit lighter.
"In that case. I"m Malcom Reynolds, your captain, welcome aboard Serenity." he said with a lazy smile extending his hand which she took in a firm handshake.
"Kara Thrace… and you have no idea just how happy I am to meet you." Her eyes lit up with a smirk and for a moment it felt like she had already lifted off.
With a nod he turned, motioning her to follow him up the ramp and into the belly of the transport. "Zoe will show you to the passenger quarters, generally cargo bay is off limits to everyone but crew, so best you take whatever you need with you." He nodded towards a beautiful, dark skinned woman. "Mealtime's round about two hors from now, you might well go get settled" he said before moving off once more.
Kara followed Zoe through into the passenger bunks, listening as she set out the ships rules, gave her a general indication of where things were, then disappeared once Kara'd been shown her room.
Overall, the crew seemed to be a sad lot, yet there was a closeness between them. Something she could relate to well… you had to be able to count on the people you flew with… your life could depend on it. And thought he ship itself may have seemed old, and they were complete strangers to her, there was a familiarity she could relate to and she felt she'd secured herself a relatively safe journey into the unknown.
The dust whipped around, biting at any exposed skin, stinging eyes and making breathing difficult. The cloud was so thick one could barely see the metallic bulk responsible for it settle to the ground. Nine months on this desolate rock and this was only the second transport ship to bring supplies. The first had been two days after they'd arrived. Basic food supplies, crop seeds, theoretically enough to get them settled. Not everyone was thrilled with the idea of farming, but they were alive. If you could call this dust ball living, it made New Caprica look downright inviting, and all things considered, that was not saying much at all.
What was worst was what they took. Most of the ships had been barely flight worthy, and coming into the atmosphere had done nothing to help that, so they'd become permanent fixtures on the ground, serving as homes and shelters against the unforgiving climate. The ships that had still been air worthy had been taken, apparently to be returned sometime later, but Galactica and the crew that had remained on board hadn't been seen or heard from since.
Zarek had assumed leadership. It was frakked up all to hell but he did look out for the people, and he sure the hell couldn't do worse than Baltar had. Hell had he been in charge at the time the Alliance encountered them maybe they would have found a better rock to dump them on. One that hadn't already been wiped out before. A scouting party had found the abandoned settlement the same afternoon the transport had dropped off supplies. The signs of struggle were evident but not a trace of who had been there before remained. Orders had been to scavenge everything they could and keep quiet. They'd established their own settlement several miles from where the other had been. Those who knew of the ghost town decided it best not to mention, things were dire enough without a panicked population.
They'd had no contact from the Alliance since. No supplies, no word… hell who knew if they were even still out there. The few thousand that remained went about setting up a new life, though sickness had claimed so many over the winder that had passed. Now there were less than twenty five thousand, and I was beginning to look like they'd just been left out here to die.
Then things had changed, word came about the transport arriving and there was a spark of hope among the colonials once again. Kara wasn't really sure how Zarek had managed it, but there was now a transport touching down with much needed medical supplies, food, and whatever else they were able to scrounge together. What was on the transport, she really wasn't interested, what she was looking for was a way out.
As the transaction took place, money and goods changing hands, she hung back, just observing the crew. Her hand settled over her pocket, a pouch of coins tucked inside. Coins she'd scavenged from those burned out buildings on that first scouting trip so many months ago. Most they'd turned over to the government, but Kara had tucked away a portion of whatever she found for herself. She'd been planning even then to find a way to buy passage away from here, away from everything. She just hadn't expected it to be so long in coming.
The dust had settled, and the supplies were being hauled back towards the settlement when she approached the ship. The man she assumed was Captain was looking out over the filed towards the old settlement, his expression almost haunted. He turned to Kara as she approached, eyebrow slightly raised in curiosity, though it would have been hard for a trained soldier to miss the slight flinch in his hand, prepared to go for his gun should he need to.. He was obviously used to things going bad.
"You take on passengers? I can pay…" She called out as she approached. At the mention of money his posture shifted, far more welcoming than before, some of the defensive stance gone.
"Depends, where you're intent on traveling to, we don't tend to go into toe core none to often."
"Suits me fine, just want off this rock, get somewhere I can find work." She pulled one of the small bag of coins from her pocket, tossing it to him." To be honest I've no idea how far that will get me, but we haven't got much here…"
His expression stayed mostly neutral, he'd have made a good gambler, as he looked at the contents of the bag. "Well, if you don't mind making a few little stops along the way, we can get you to persephone inside of a fortnight."
"Suits me fine…" She smiled a little, the prospect of getting off the rock finally making her feel a little bit lighter.
"In that case. I"m Malcom Reynolds, your captain, welcome aboard Serenity." he said with a lazy smile extending his hand which she took in a firm handshake.
"Kara Thrace… and you have no idea just how happy I am to meet you." Her eyes lit up with a smirk and for a moment it felt like she had already lifted off.
With a nod he turned, motioning her to follow him up the ramp and into the belly of the transport. "Zoe will show you to the passenger quarters, generally cargo bay is off limits to everyone but crew, so best you take whatever you need with you." He nodded towards a beautiful, dark skinned woman. "Mealtime's round about two hors from now, you might well go get settled" he said before moving off once more.
Kara followed Zoe through into the passenger bunks, listening as she set out the ships rules, gave her a general indication of where things were, then disappeared once Kara'd been shown her room.
Overall, the crew seemed to be a sad lot, yet there was a closeness between them. Something she could relate to well… you had to be able to count on the people you flew with… your life could depend on it. And thought he ship itself may have seemed old, and they were complete strangers to her, there was a familiarity she could relate to and she felt she'd secured herself a relatively safe journey into the unknown.
A lot of old work
There were a LOT of old stories I worked on, rather than re-post them here I will link to the journal they are on. These were written in tandem with a friend at the time, probably my most prolific writing period. Feel free to browse the list and read at your leisure.
The Journal is no longer being maintained, but it will remain up i have been told.
The Journal is no longer being maintained, but it will remain up i have been told.
Muse Topics 4
If you could wish for one thing, and be assured of getting it, what would you wish for?
If I could wish for something and be assured of getting it, what would it be? For one day I wish I could know what was going on inside my best friend’s head. I would give anything to really know what he’s thinking when he gives me that lopsided grin. The grin he seems to reserve only for me… I’ve seen him grin at other people, but it’s not the same grin. This one has a special quality. Sometimes I like to think its affection… I wish I knew.
I wish I knew what it was that made his eyes light up just that way. He’s got the most incredible eyes… though many only see the icy blue businesslike gaze, there is another. A warm, soothing look, where the icy blue gives way to a tropical azure that could entrance even the coldest of hearts to gaze into their depths for hours if he would let them. But that look is fleeting. I only catch it on occasion when I turn around quickly. Within seconds the steel blue is back. What is he thinking then? I wish I knew…
I wish I knew where I stood… What does he really think of me? Am I really just a pilot to him? He’s more than just the CAG to me. Am I just his best friend? Gods I know I’m that but could I be more? Would he let me? I think I know how I feel about him, but how does he feel about me?
I wish I knew.
What do you think of when you hear the word - Fear?
Fear.
Now there is a word I am all too sick and tired of hearing, of seeing… I see it in the eyes of the nuggets when the klaxons sound the first time after they get their wings. The ones whose eyes I see it in… They're the ones I won't see make it back, maybe not this time, but the next.
With what we do, fear is instant death.
You have to go out there every time and look those metal motherfrakkers right in their glowing red eye and not flinch. If you flinch you're dead, your wingman is dead… the raider gets through. There is a saying that we live by… "You're already dead but you just don' know it." You live by that and you don't fear dying. You live every frakkin moment to the fullest. Seize every second and make the most of it cause one day, you're gonna be off your game and you're gonna be frakked right up the exhaust pipe.
Its true what they say, the only thing to fear, is fear itself. I don't fear dying, I don't fear injury. I don't fear reproach or punishment. The only thing I fear… is that one day I will look into that glowing red orb and be afraid.
Tell a story about the dumbest thing you've ever done.
I still sit here and think of just where the evening started to go wrong… I think it was about the time I decided to prove that I could clean up real good… in the hopes of rendering him speechless. There I was, me, the biggest tomboy in the 12 colonies, dolled up in a dress and heels, hair done, the works…. Well it worked. Lee was speechless alright, managed the corniest of compliments… Gods he was adorable… Awestruck even… Moments later we were on the dancefloor, dancing, laughing, and enjoying one another's company…
The next thing I know Gaius cuts in and Lee is gone… Gaius is smooth and free with the compliments, and with the ambrosia… Too free… Ambrosia and I are old friends. My partner in crime as it were. I'm not sure at what point, but somewhere along the line I wound up back in his room for yet one more glass of that fine liquor. I think I left my better judgment back at the dance…
Flirting turns to touching… and Gods it's been too long so I surrender… Even though I he was the farthest one from my mind… a fact which later became painfully evident for both of us…
I barely dress enough to e decent and retreat to the safety of my bunk… wishing like hell the bulkhead would just open up and swallow me whole… Gods how could I let that happen… Only ambrosia knows.
Which is your favorite Sin and why?
I would have to say at this point in my life, Wrath is the sin I embrace the most. In all honesty, it fuels the urge just to get out of bed in the morning. It is my wingman in combat and my friend in solitude.
Why Wrath? Well I figure I've earned the right… as has every other person still living… the cylons took everything from us. Our homes, our families, our future… All gone in a few short hours. Now we live on the run, teachers, doctors, lawyers, farmers, children… forced to become nomads in space, having to fight every day for the barest of necessities.
There is no room left for greed, save from a few who choose to profit off of humanity's misfortune. Lust is an escape... but still a luxury that time rarely allows for indulgence in. even pride has been stripped away bit by bit. How can one be a glutton when there are barely enough rations to go around… Envy? Maybe some envy those who don't have to put their lives on the line every day… Sloth… there's just not enough time for that either. All that is left to feel is wrath.
And every time I launch out into combat I make damned sure every raider feels it.
If I could wish for something and be assured of getting it, what would it be? For one day I wish I could know what was going on inside my best friend’s head. I would give anything to really know what he’s thinking when he gives me that lopsided grin. The grin he seems to reserve only for me… I’ve seen him grin at other people, but it’s not the same grin. This one has a special quality. Sometimes I like to think its affection… I wish I knew.
I wish I knew what it was that made his eyes light up just that way. He’s got the most incredible eyes… though many only see the icy blue businesslike gaze, there is another. A warm, soothing look, where the icy blue gives way to a tropical azure that could entrance even the coldest of hearts to gaze into their depths for hours if he would let them. But that look is fleeting. I only catch it on occasion when I turn around quickly. Within seconds the steel blue is back. What is he thinking then? I wish I knew…
I wish I knew where I stood… What does he really think of me? Am I really just a pilot to him? He’s more than just the CAG to me. Am I just his best friend? Gods I know I’m that but could I be more? Would he let me? I think I know how I feel about him, but how does he feel about me?
I wish I knew.
What do you think of when you hear the word - Fear?
Fear.
Now there is a word I am all too sick and tired of hearing, of seeing… I see it in the eyes of the nuggets when the klaxons sound the first time after they get their wings. The ones whose eyes I see it in… They're the ones I won't see make it back, maybe not this time, but the next.
With what we do, fear is instant death.
You have to go out there every time and look those metal motherfrakkers right in their glowing red eye and not flinch. If you flinch you're dead, your wingman is dead… the raider gets through. There is a saying that we live by… "You're already dead but you just don' know it." You live by that and you don't fear dying. You live every frakkin moment to the fullest. Seize every second and make the most of it cause one day, you're gonna be off your game and you're gonna be frakked right up the exhaust pipe.
Its true what they say, the only thing to fear, is fear itself. I don't fear dying, I don't fear injury. I don't fear reproach or punishment. The only thing I fear… is that one day I will look into that glowing red orb and be afraid.
Tell a story about the dumbest thing you've ever done.
I still sit here and think of just where the evening started to go wrong… I think it was about the time I decided to prove that I could clean up real good… in the hopes of rendering him speechless. There I was, me, the biggest tomboy in the 12 colonies, dolled up in a dress and heels, hair done, the works…. Well it worked. Lee was speechless alright, managed the corniest of compliments… Gods he was adorable… Awestruck even… Moments later we were on the dancefloor, dancing, laughing, and enjoying one another's company…
The next thing I know Gaius cuts in and Lee is gone… Gaius is smooth and free with the compliments, and with the ambrosia… Too free… Ambrosia and I are old friends. My partner in crime as it were. I'm not sure at what point, but somewhere along the line I wound up back in his room for yet one more glass of that fine liquor. I think I left my better judgment back at the dance…
Flirting turns to touching… and Gods it's been too long so I surrender… Even though I he was the farthest one from my mind… a fact which later became painfully evident for both of us…
I barely dress enough to e decent and retreat to the safety of my bunk… wishing like hell the bulkhead would just open up and swallow me whole… Gods how could I let that happen… Only ambrosia knows.
Which is your favorite Sin and why?
I would have to say at this point in my life, Wrath is the sin I embrace the most. In all honesty, it fuels the urge just to get out of bed in the morning. It is my wingman in combat and my friend in solitude.
Why Wrath? Well I figure I've earned the right… as has every other person still living… the cylons took everything from us. Our homes, our families, our future… All gone in a few short hours. Now we live on the run, teachers, doctors, lawyers, farmers, children… forced to become nomads in space, having to fight every day for the barest of necessities.
There is no room left for greed, save from a few who choose to profit off of humanity's misfortune. Lust is an escape... but still a luxury that time rarely allows for indulgence in. even pride has been stripped away bit by bit. How can one be a glutton when there are barely enough rations to go around… Envy? Maybe some envy those who don't have to put their lives on the line every day… Sloth… there's just not enough time for that either. All that is left to feel is wrath.
And every time I launch out into combat I make damned sure every raider feels it.
Muse Topics 3
When did you realize things were just "not going to be okay."
Reading the question, she chuckles… have things ever been ok? She tries to sort through the events of her life to find a time that would apply to… she’s never had a time, other than Zak, where things seemed even remotely ok. But that was her life.
Ok was a relative state of mind… The cylons attacked, destroying everything she knew to be home, and yet there was something that was left that helped her believe everything would still be alright. She had been involved in the destruction of the Olympic Carrier, 1300 souls possibly still on board. Yet her faith held. Water was short and there were hostage situations, and yet she could still see a silver lining.
Even crash landing on a planet after confessing your sins to the only father she’d known in years didn’t bring her down. She continued to fight, continued to frak up… She took the wrong man to her bed, took a punch from the right one, found out the president was dying and the commander had lied to her… and still she pressed on.
It was standing battered and bruised in the ruins of a museum, having fought for her life with a cylon that the world came crashing down around her. She found her friend, Helo… but over his shoulder there stood another, Boomer… Sharon…. She had seen her only hours before on the Galactica… one word summed it all up… Cylon. She reached for Helo’s gun and trained it on the woman. He deflected her arm and it was the next words she heard that destroyed the fragile grip she held on herself… the cylon was pregnant… Her scream echoed through the ruins as she sank down. Finally broken, and she knew, nothing would be the same again.
Careful What You Wish For
I know most people wish I that was more responsible… more by the book. They wish I would tow the line and act the disciplined soldier I was trained to be. You know the type… the good girl who never talks back, keeps her boots polished, would never dream of getting in the face of a superior.
Instead they got me; warts and all. I’m insubordinate. If I don’t like you I will tell you, right to your face. I don’t give a frak if you’re my superior or not. I’ve even been known to use my fists to prove my point. I speak my mind, whether my opinion is wanted or not.
I’ve been branded a troublemaker, a rogue… I live outside the box. Now, consider if I took away the things that people found too brash, too abrasive... crawled back into the box like a good little soldier. What would happen? Who could they count on to haul their asses out of the fire when it came down to the wire? Who would take the chances, push the envelope?
Be careful what you wish for, you really wouldn’t want me to be anyone else.
Kara Thrace
Battlestar Galactica
196 words
Talk about a time you overcame serious self-doubt.
Self doubt has always been a part of my existence… the first seeds planted when I was a child. My mother always believed I wouldn’t amount to anything, that I was useless… For years I believed her. I let her crush me down, keep me under her control.
When I was sixteen that all began to change; I began to see myself as an individual; separate from her. Her opinion was just that… hers. She had tried for so long to push me to the career she had chosen for me. The military. Of course she wanted to make me a marine. That’s what she was… and that way she would always be my superior. I refused.
Instead I started learning to play Pyramid. It was a rough sport, but I was good at it. Damn good in fact. The more I played, the more I separated from her opinion of me. I had a scholarship to the academy; I was being scouted to play professional… I was going places. I was somebody. Then it happened.
My newfound world was shattered when I busted up my knee on the court. Everything I had worked for was gone, and there she was again, with the ‘I told you so’s.’ Weeks later doctors would confirm the worst. I would never play again. While I would regain the strength in my knee, I would never have the mobility to keep up on the court. I was devastated. I started to think maybe she was right, maybe I wasn’t cut out for anything other than the career she chose… I took the tests the doctors brought me, half hearted most of the time. Aptitude test, entrance exams… they all tried to help me.
What surprised me the most was when I received the call… Flight school. I couldn’t believe it. Me? A Pilot? I wasn’t sure if I should… Mom didn’t think I could do it… I wasn’t sure I could either…
Looking back I’m glad I pushed the doubt aside and accepted.
Kara Thrace
Battlestar Galactica
339 words
What is the worst thing that has ever been done TO you?
For someone looking in, it might be hard to pick which of the things that has happened to me over the course of my life has been the worst. I grew up in a broken home, child to an alcoholic mother who saw me as the source of all her troubles. After all life had been good before I was born.
I’ve endured endless hours of dark closets, not knowing when I would eat again; my only companion the spiders that spun their webs in the spaces beneath the stairs. When the closet ceased to scare me, the real abuse started. I was late coming home from school… she whipped my wrists until they bled; reminding me I should wear a watch. She broke each one of my fingers when i played a prank… I could go on… but none of these amounts to what was done to me on Caprica.
What did they do? That’s what makes it the worst. All I know is that they cut me open… I don’t know if they took something out or put something in… I saw what they had done to the other women… what they were trying to do… was that what they had planned for me? To turn me into a living incubator for half human machines..?
It still haunts me at night… Its been six weeks and the waiting continues… Under normal circumstances I would be even more worried… but these are not normal circumstances, anything could cause me to be this late… malnutrition being at the top of the list, right next to stress… both of which are dealt out here in abundance. I’m going to try once again tonight not to think about it…. Maybe tomorrow…
Reading the question, she chuckles… have things ever been ok? She tries to sort through the events of her life to find a time that would apply to… she’s never had a time, other than Zak, where things seemed even remotely ok. But that was her life.
Ok was a relative state of mind… The cylons attacked, destroying everything she knew to be home, and yet there was something that was left that helped her believe everything would still be alright. She had been involved in the destruction of the Olympic Carrier, 1300 souls possibly still on board. Yet her faith held. Water was short and there were hostage situations, and yet she could still see a silver lining.
Even crash landing on a planet after confessing your sins to the only father she’d known in years didn’t bring her down. She continued to fight, continued to frak up… She took the wrong man to her bed, took a punch from the right one, found out the president was dying and the commander had lied to her… and still she pressed on.
It was standing battered and bruised in the ruins of a museum, having fought for her life with a cylon that the world came crashing down around her. She found her friend, Helo… but over his shoulder there stood another, Boomer… Sharon…. She had seen her only hours before on the Galactica… one word summed it all up… Cylon. She reached for Helo’s gun and trained it on the woman. He deflected her arm and it was the next words she heard that destroyed the fragile grip she held on herself… the cylon was pregnant… Her scream echoed through the ruins as she sank down. Finally broken, and she knew, nothing would be the same again.
Careful What You Wish For
I know most people wish I that was more responsible… more by the book. They wish I would tow the line and act the disciplined soldier I was trained to be. You know the type… the good girl who never talks back, keeps her boots polished, would never dream of getting in the face of a superior.
Instead they got me; warts and all. I’m insubordinate. If I don’t like you I will tell you, right to your face. I don’t give a frak if you’re my superior or not. I’ve even been known to use my fists to prove my point. I speak my mind, whether my opinion is wanted or not.
I’ve been branded a troublemaker, a rogue… I live outside the box. Now, consider if I took away the things that people found too brash, too abrasive... crawled back into the box like a good little soldier. What would happen? Who could they count on to haul their asses out of the fire when it came down to the wire? Who would take the chances, push the envelope?
Be careful what you wish for, you really wouldn’t want me to be anyone else.
Kara Thrace
Battlestar Galactica
196 words
Talk about a time you overcame serious self-doubt.
Self doubt has always been a part of my existence… the first seeds planted when I was a child. My mother always believed I wouldn’t amount to anything, that I was useless… For years I believed her. I let her crush me down, keep me under her control.
When I was sixteen that all began to change; I began to see myself as an individual; separate from her. Her opinion was just that… hers. She had tried for so long to push me to the career she had chosen for me. The military. Of course she wanted to make me a marine. That’s what she was… and that way she would always be my superior. I refused.
Instead I started learning to play Pyramid. It was a rough sport, but I was good at it. Damn good in fact. The more I played, the more I separated from her opinion of me. I had a scholarship to the academy; I was being scouted to play professional… I was going places. I was somebody. Then it happened.
My newfound world was shattered when I busted up my knee on the court. Everything I had worked for was gone, and there she was again, with the ‘I told you so’s.’ Weeks later doctors would confirm the worst. I would never play again. While I would regain the strength in my knee, I would never have the mobility to keep up on the court. I was devastated. I started to think maybe she was right, maybe I wasn’t cut out for anything other than the career she chose… I took the tests the doctors brought me, half hearted most of the time. Aptitude test, entrance exams… they all tried to help me.
What surprised me the most was when I received the call… Flight school. I couldn’t believe it. Me? A Pilot? I wasn’t sure if I should… Mom didn’t think I could do it… I wasn’t sure I could either…
Looking back I’m glad I pushed the doubt aside and accepted.
Kara Thrace
Battlestar Galactica
339 words
What is the worst thing that has ever been done TO you?
For someone looking in, it might be hard to pick which of the things that has happened to me over the course of my life has been the worst. I grew up in a broken home, child to an alcoholic mother who saw me as the source of all her troubles. After all life had been good before I was born.
I’ve endured endless hours of dark closets, not knowing when I would eat again; my only companion the spiders that spun their webs in the spaces beneath the stairs. When the closet ceased to scare me, the real abuse started. I was late coming home from school… she whipped my wrists until they bled; reminding me I should wear a watch. She broke each one of my fingers when i played a prank… I could go on… but none of these amounts to what was done to me on Caprica.
What did they do? That’s what makes it the worst. All I know is that they cut me open… I don’t know if they took something out or put something in… I saw what they had done to the other women… what they were trying to do… was that what they had planned for me? To turn me into a living incubator for half human machines..?
It still haunts me at night… Its been six weeks and the waiting continues… Under normal circumstances I would be even more worried… but these are not normal circumstances, anything could cause me to be this late… malnutrition being at the top of the list, right next to stress… both of which are dealt out here in abundance. I’m going to try once again tonight not to think about it…. Maybe tomorrow…
Muse Topics 2
What is the best present you have ever given someone else?
I met someone… someone pretty incredible. He was nothing like Lee though, but he was filled with indomitable spirit, fighting in a hopeless situation… Despite being outgunned and out experienced. He never gave up. None of them did.
They took me in once they were sure I was safe. I became one of their own. We grew close over the days spent there… we had a lot in common and our friendship came easily. We both knew that there may be no tomorrow, that at any moment things could go bad and we would all parish in that irradiated wasteland that once was our home. So we found happiness where we could, taking comfort in the little things, a game of pyramid, a gentle touch, a teasing kiss… but there were no strings attached… neither one expected anything more beyond the moment.
He came for me when I was captured. With the others I found my way back to the relative safety of the resistance camp. We both knew I had a mission to complete… and he had kept the arrow safe all this time. I had to finish what I had started… despite the thousands here that still needed help. I had to go home, to the fleet, to the Galactica, to Lee.
Moments before I left, I took one of my dog tags and pressed it into his hand. In that simple moment, I gave more than I could have imagined… In the darkest of nights that had fallen on our former home, I gave him the one thing that could sustain him, keep him fighting….
I gave him hope.
Kara Thrace
Battlestar Galactica
272 words
Who do you miss the most?
I suppose for most people this would be a pretty straight forward question with a quick and simple answer. Family… a friend… a lover… But then I’m not most people and I don’t do simple and straightforward.
Now if I did, my answer would be something like my father. He left us when I was only about six or seven, but he was still the glue that held the world together and I was his baby girl. I never understood why he left, and I still to this day miss him. Or it could be my fiancé who was killed only a few weeks before we were to have been married. He died in a horrific crash… it was my fault, he wasn’t ready but I put him in that plane anyway because he wanted it so much and because I felt… well that’s not important now, and another topic entirely.
Ironically, with billions of people dead the person I miss the most is sleeping across the bunkroom; not 30 feet away from where I sit writing this… How can you miss someone who’s not gone? It’s really quite simple. War changes people, changes relationships, changes dynamics… and being a royal screw-up just helps to motivate those changes even further.
We barely talk anymore… when we do it’s as CAG and lead pilot… no time for friends anymore. I miss his laugh, the way blue eyes sparkle with mischief. He doesn’t laugh much anymore. He works too hard, runs himself too thin. Don’t get me wrong he’s damn good at his job, but he’s wearing himself out. I miss being able to just kick back and relax with him, when silence didn’t seem awkward and talking didn’t seem forced. I miss the shoulder to cry on, because he’s the only one who’s ever seen me really cry; there’s no time for tears anymore.
I managed to frak it all up royally… the how and why is another matter entirely. I’ve tried to do things for the right reasons… but they always come out wrong. I misinterpreted reserve for rejection… control for a cold shoulder… I’ve done some stupid things… damaged what we had… I only hope that someday we can rebuild… I guess my answer isn’t that far from the simple… he is my family, my friend… and I love him like no other…
And finally in answer to our question, who do I miss most? That’s easy… Lee Adama.
Talk about a time you realized that someone close to you was not the person you thought you knew.
Why is it when you’re at your lowest point, life decides it needs to give you one last swift kick to the gut? Things couldn’t have been much worse… there I was, on a radiation contaminated planet, having jumped thousands of lightyears from the fleet. Lee and I were not on speaking terms, beyond what we needed to do to do our jobs, my good friend of seven years just tried to kill herself; but put a bullet through her cheek instead. I get here and pretty much get my ass handed to me by a blonde cylon; only reason I beat her is because I no longer cared if I survived the fight, so long as she didn’t either. A 25 foot drop later and I’m still alive, she’s not.
For a moment things seemed to be looking up. Strong hands had lifted me from where I fell, turning me to look in the eyes of a friend I thought lost forever. He helped me up, steadied me against the wall… gods it was so good to see him again… then, there was movement over his shoulder.
Seven years I’ve know Sharon Valerii, before she even went through flight school. We’d been through a lot together… I thought I knew everything about her… boy was I wrong. There, standing on the ledge above was Sharon… only it wasn’t Sharon, my Sharon was in sickbay with a hole in her face…I know, I saw her just before I jumped here… but there she was. Flight suit and all… her arm was in a sling, her shoulder injured… but she was there, and there was no mark on her face. That’s when I realized… Sharon was a cylon… oh gods… a frakkin cylon…
I remember grabbing for Helo’s gun… my first instinct to shoot it there on the spot… then he said it… that thing was pregnant…. And my world shattered.
I met someone… someone pretty incredible. He was nothing like Lee though, but he was filled with indomitable spirit, fighting in a hopeless situation… Despite being outgunned and out experienced. He never gave up. None of them did.
They took me in once they were sure I was safe. I became one of their own. We grew close over the days spent there… we had a lot in common and our friendship came easily. We both knew that there may be no tomorrow, that at any moment things could go bad and we would all parish in that irradiated wasteland that once was our home. So we found happiness where we could, taking comfort in the little things, a game of pyramid, a gentle touch, a teasing kiss… but there were no strings attached… neither one expected anything more beyond the moment.
He came for me when I was captured. With the others I found my way back to the relative safety of the resistance camp. We both knew I had a mission to complete… and he had kept the arrow safe all this time. I had to finish what I had started… despite the thousands here that still needed help. I had to go home, to the fleet, to the Galactica, to Lee.
Moments before I left, I took one of my dog tags and pressed it into his hand. In that simple moment, I gave more than I could have imagined… In the darkest of nights that had fallen on our former home, I gave him the one thing that could sustain him, keep him fighting….
I gave him hope.
Kara Thrace
Battlestar Galactica
272 words
Who do you miss the most?
I suppose for most people this would be a pretty straight forward question with a quick and simple answer. Family… a friend… a lover… But then I’m not most people and I don’t do simple and straightforward.
Now if I did, my answer would be something like my father. He left us when I was only about six or seven, but he was still the glue that held the world together and I was his baby girl. I never understood why he left, and I still to this day miss him. Or it could be my fiancé who was killed only a few weeks before we were to have been married. He died in a horrific crash… it was my fault, he wasn’t ready but I put him in that plane anyway because he wanted it so much and because I felt… well that’s not important now, and another topic entirely.
Ironically, with billions of people dead the person I miss the most is sleeping across the bunkroom; not 30 feet away from where I sit writing this… How can you miss someone who’s not gone? It’s really quite simple. War changes people, changes relationships, changes dynamics… and being a royal screw-up just helps to motivate those changes even further.
We barely talk anymore… when we do it’s as CAG and lead pilot… no time for friends anymore. I miss his laugh, the way blue eyes sparkle with mischief. He doesn’t laugh much anymore. He works too hard, runs himself too thin. Don’t get me wrong he’s damn good at his job, but he’s wearing himself out. I miss being able to just kick back and relax with him, when silence didn’t seem awkward and talking didn’t seem forced. I miss the shoulder to cry on, because he’s the only one who’s ever seen me really cry; there’s no time for tears anymore.
I managed to frak it all up royally… the how and why is another matter entirely. I’ve tried to do things for the right reasons… but they always come out wrong. I misinterpreted reserve for rejection… control for a cold shoulder… I’ve done some stupid things… damaged what we had… I only hope that someday we can rebuild… I guess my answer isn’t that far from the simple… he is my family, my friend… and I love him like no other…
And finally in answer to our question, who do I miss most? That’s easy… Lee Adama.
Talk about a time you realized that someone close to you was not the person you thought you knew.
Why is it when you’re at your lowest point, life decides it needs to give you one last swift kick to the gut? Things couldn’t have been much worse… there I was, on a radiation contaminated planet, having jumped thousands of lightyears from the fleet. Lee and I were not on speaking terms, beyond what we needed to do to do our jobs, my good friend of seven years just tried to kill herself; but put a bullet through her cheek instead. I get here and pretty much get my ass handed to me by a blonde cylon; only reason I beat her is because I no longer cared if I survived the fight, so long as she didn’t either. A 25 foot drop later and I’m still alive, she’s not.
For a moment things seemed to be looking up. Strong hands had lifted me from where I fell, turning me to look in the eyes of a friend I thought lost forever. He helped me up, steadied me against the wall… gods it was so good to see him again… then, there was movement over his shoulder.
Seven years I’ve know Sharon Valerii, before she even went through flight school. We’d been through a lot together… I thought I knew everything about her… boy was I wrong. There, standing on the ledge above was Sharon… only it wasn’t Sharon, my Sharon was in sickbay with a hole in her face…I know, I saw her just before I jumped here… but there she was. Flight suit and all… her arm was in a sling, her shoulder injured… but she was there, and there was no mark on her face. That’s when I realized… Sharon was a cylon… oh gods… a frakkin cylon…
I remember grabbing for Helo’s gun… my first instinct to shoot it there on the spot… then he said it… that thing was pregnant…. And my world shattered.
Several Muse Topics
What is your greatest strength?
My greatest strength lies in faith. It is behind everything I do, every hour of every day. My mother taught me young that faith was important. She went to great lengths to instill this in me. She insisted every day that I learn to pray. And so I did. Every day I prayed, and I had faith that one day I would be free… I was nearly sixteen when they took me away; prayers answered.
I still pray, but my prayers are less formal than they once were. I still take out the idols of my patron goddesses, Artemis and Aphrodite, setting them carefully on the velvet cloth in a silent moment. However most of my prayers are hurried whispers as my viper is loaded into the tubes and launched into combat against an enemy that outnumbers and outguns us. I let faith take it from there.
I have faith in the knuckledraggers on Chief Tyrol’s crew. I know all the repairs will be done. I have faith that those repairs will hold through just one more fight. I have faith that my shots will hit their intended target, faith that we’ll al make it back in one piece.
I have faith that we’ll manage to find water and food when we need it, that as a race we will survive, that I will one day see a sunrise again. I have faith that one day… We will find Earth.
Kara Thrace
Battlestar Galactica
240 words
Color me Blue
How is it possible to love and hate a color at the same time? I always loved the blue of the sky when I would lie in the grass and watch the clouds as a little girl. I guess it only made sense that I would one day become a pilot and live in the depths of that deep blue… but there are other shades of blue, darker shades.
Those shades are the ones I hate. The blue that borders on black, which rings the outside of the bruises forming on your cheek when you’ve spoken out of turn. Or even darker, when a bone breaks, turning your hands near black, swollen and unusable… those are the shades of blue that colored my childhood.
As I’ve grown though. I’ve learned to appreciate the lighter shades of blue. The duty uniform I wear; the military is the only place I’ve ever really felt wanted or needed. The blue steel of a Mark VII Viper; my ticket to freedom… However, the best shade of blue there is belongs to the eyes that smile at me from across the bunkroom…
Blue eyes that stare right into my soul, tearing down carefully built walls. Touching me in ways even a lover’s hands cannot compete with, stealing my heart with every glance. Hard yet gentle at the same time… and always present. I’ve heard it said that clothes make the man… but not in this case. Blue eyes make Lee Adama.
Kara Thrace
Battlestar Galactica
246 Words
When in your life did you feel the most alone?
Alone is a feeling I have known all too well; though lately loneliness and I have gotten re-acquainted. Spending several days on a near barren planet that once was inhabited by billions of people is a lonely feeling, that is true… it doesn’t even begin to compare to true loneliness.
I first thought I felt it when I told Lee about passing Zak through basic flight… then set out on a potential suicide mission to gain intel on just what was waiting for us beyond that cloud, then weeks later, when had to make that same confession to Zaks’ father. It tore me up inside. The hurt in his eyes… I felt I had lost the only father I ever knew…
Weeks later, I would find out what it truly meant to be lonely. I found out that the man I trusted as a father had lied to all of us… he had no idea where we were going… Lee was angry with me for yet another one of my many screw ups… I tried to apologize… tried to make things right…
That’s when I learned what it truly felt like to be alone. I said I was sorry… and he just walked away.
Kara Thrace
Battlestar Galactica
204 Words
Have you ever betrayed someone's confidence? Has anyone ever betrayed you? Write a ficlet on the theme of betrayal.
Betrayal… The utter devastation of the fragile trust between us all. It can be carefully planned, intentional secrets withheld through a misguided belief that it is for the greater good. Or it may be a harsh word spoken in the heat of an argument. Either way the knife cuts as deep.
Betrayer or betrayed? I am both.
I unknowingly betrayed my best friend when I left the Colonial Day celebrations on the arm of another. Honestly I had no indications that he saw me as more than a friend… that on some level he saw me as his girl…
Ironically I had always wanted that to be the case, but too much had happened over the years. There was as much friction as there was fire between us. If I am honest with myself, I know I have loved him a long time… years… I wanted so desperately for it to be his arms that held me, his breath hot against my neck, his flesh searing against mine… wanted so much that I betrayed my heart, letting another take me, the betrayal complete when Lee’s name slipped from my lips…
Only a few hours later he would confront me on my betrayal; airing the hurt and pain he felt ( Your just a pilot, I’m just a CAG) in front of a deck full of grunts and knuckledraggers. His words stung ( a pilot who can’t keep her pants on) but I knew he was hurting. I myself would not understand just how much betrayal hurt until later.
Commander Adama has no idea where Earth is. He never did. He made it up; in order to give people hope.
Her words were still ringing in my ears as I caught up with him on the catwalk overlooking the hangar deck. A few casual words were exchanged before I couldn’t hold it in any longer.
Can I ask you a question Boss...? I know he wouldn’t lie to me directly… he just wouldn’t…
Sure
How much longer til we reach Earth? There… its asked…
Its hard to say… It wasn’t a direct answer…. But it was a start…
Got a guess?
You know I don’t like to guess… Come ON… I know you know, just tell me you know… I could feel the sickening feeling rising. He wouldn’t look me in the eye…
We getting closer? This is me… come on, you know you can tell me anything… I’m giving you an out.
I’m sure we are… he stepped back from the railing… Good luck on the jump test tomorrow… With those last words he turned and walked away, never having looked me in the eye since I asked the first question, never seeing my heart, my faith in him shattered… He lied. He lied to the fleet…. He really didn’t know… he lied… he lied to me….
The man I held as close as my own father didn’t trust me with the truth. So he lied and I finally understood just how deep the cut of betrayal is felt.
Kara Thrace
Battlestar Galactica
511 words
My greatest strength lies in faith. It is behind everything I do, every hour of every day. My mother taught me young that faith was important. She went to great lengths to instill this in me. She insisted every day that I learn to pray. And so I did. Every day I prayed, and I had faith that one day I would be free… I was nearly sixteen when they took me away; prayers answered.
I still pray, but my prayers are less formal than they once were. I still take out the idols of my patron goddesses, Artemis and Aphrodite, setting them carefully on the velvet cloth in a silent moment. However most of my prayers are hurried whispers as my viper is loaded into the tubes and launched into combat against an enemy that outnumbers and outguns us. I let faith take it from there.
I have faith in the knuckledraggers on Chief Tyrol’s crew. I know all the repairs will be done. I have faith that those repairs will hold through just one more fight. I have faith that my shots will hit their intended target, faith that we’ll al make it back in one piece.
I have faith that we’ll manage to find water and food when we need it, that as a race we will survive, that I will one day see a sunrise again. I have faith that one day… We will find Earth.
Kara Thrace
Battlestar Galactica
240 words
Color me Blue
How is it possible to love and hate a color at the same time? I always loved the blue of the sky when I would lie in the grass and watch the clouds as a little girl. I guess it only made sense that I would one day become a pilot and live in the depths of that deep blue… but there are other shades of blue, darker shades.
Those shades are the ones I hate. The blue that borders on black, which rings the outside of the bruises forming on your cheek when you’ve spoken out of turn. Or even darker, when a bone breaks, turning your hands near black, swollen and unusable… those are the shades of blue that colored my childhood.
As I’ve grown though. I’ve learned to appreciate the lighter shades of blue. The duty uniform I wear; the military is the only place I’ve ever really felt wanted or needed. The blue steel of a Mark VII Viper; my ticket to freedom… However, the best shade of blue there is belongs to the eyes that smile at me from across the bunkroom…
Blue eyes that stare right into my soul, tearing down carefully built walls. Touching me in ways even a lover’s hands cannot compete with, stealing my heart with every glance. Hard yet gentle at the same time… and always present. I’ve heard it said that clothes make the man… but not in this case. Blue eyes make Lee Adama.
Kara Thrace
Battlestar Galactica
246 Words
When in your life did you feel the most alone?
Alone is a feeling I have known all too well; though lately loneliness and I have gotten re-acquainted. Spending several days on a near barren planet that once was inhabited by billions of people is a lonely feeling, that is true… it doesn’t even begin to compare to true loneliness.
I first thought I felt it when I told Lee about passing Zak through basic flight… then set out on a potential suicide mission to gain intel on just what was waiting for us beyond that cloud, then weeks later, when had to make that same confession to Zaks’ father. It tore me up inside. The hurt in his eyes… I felt I had lost the only father I ever knew…
Weeks later, I would find out what it truly meant to be lonely. I found out that the man I trusted as a father had lied to all of us… he had no idea where we were going… Lee was angry with me for yet another one of my many screw ups… I tried to apologize… tried to make things right…
That’s when I learned what it truly felt like to be alone. I said I was sorry… and he just walked away.
Kara Thrace
Battlestar Galactica
204 Words
Have you ever betrayed someone's confidence? Has anyone ever betrayed you? Write a ficlet on the theme of betrayal.
Betrayal… The utter devastation of the fragile trust between us all. It can be carefully planned, intentional secrets withheld through a misguided belief that it is for the greater good. Or it may be a harsh word spoken in the heat of an argument. Either way the knife cuts as deep.
Betrayer or betrayed? I am both.
I unknowingly betrayed my best friend when I left the Colonial Day celebrations on the arm of another. Honestly I had no indications that he saw me as more than a friend… that on some level he saw me as his girl…
Ironically I had always wanted that to be the case, but too much had happened over the years. There was as much friction as there was fire between us. If I am honest with myself, I know I have loved him a long time… years… I wanted so desperately for it to be his arms that held me, his breath hot against my neck, his flesh searing against mine… wanted so much that I betrayed my heart, letting another take me, the betrayal complete when Lee’s name slipped from my lips…
Only a few hours later he would confront me on my betrayal; airing the hurt and pain he felt ( Your just a pilot, I’m just a CAG) in front of a deck full of grunts and knuckledraggers. His words stung ( a pilot who can’t keep her pants on) but I knew he was hurting. I myself would not understand just how much betrayal hurt until later.
Commander Adama has no idea where Earth is. He never did. He made it up; in order to give people hope.
Her words were still ringing in my ears as I caught up with him on the catwalk overlooking the hangar deck. A few casual words were exchanged before I couldn’t hold it in any longer.
Can I ask you a question Boss...? I know he wouldn’t lie to me directly… he just wouldn’t…
Sure
How much longer til we reach Earth? There… its asked…
Its hard to say… It wasn’t a direct answer…. But it was a start…
Got a guess?
You know I don’t like to guess… Come ON… I know you know, just tell me you know… I could feel the sickening feeling rising. He wouldn’t look me in the eye…
We getting closer? This is me… come on, you know you can tell me anything… I’m giving you an out.
I’m sure we are… he stepped back from the railing… Good luck on the jump test tomorrow… With those last words he turned and walked away, never having looked me in the eye since I asked the first question, never seeing my heart, my faith in him shattered… He lied. He lied to the fleet…. He really didn’t know… he lied… he lied to me….
The man I held as close as my own father didn’t trust me with the truth. So he lied and I finally understood just how deep the cut of betrayal is felt.
Kara Thrace
Battlestar Galactica
511 words
The Ring
Another drabble I wrote just after seeing first episogde of season 1... I had a desperate need to explain why she didn't have the rin on in the mini but did once we saw her in season 1.
A ring…. A simple silver band… something so small for the significance it carries. It was to have been his, but the Lords saw fit to punish my lack of judgment by taking him from me… I still vividly recall the day of the funeral.
As I stood in front of my locker, fastening the final clasp on the sash of my dress uniform, there sat the box on the shelf. It was exactly where it had been since I bought it three months before… but now it seemed to stare right at me. As if my hands were acting of their own will I reached for the box, taking the ring from its velvet cage, placing it securely on my left thumb… a reminder that he should have been at my side.
There it remained throughout the day, and throughout the next several weeks… until the day I set foot on the Galactica for the first time. That day the ring returned to its velvet box on the shelf in my locker, where it sat for two years. Until today…
Why today? 24 hours ago everything was as it should be… The Galactica was to be decommissioned… we were all hanging in limbo, waiting for out next postings… I was returning to Picon… the final flight with my squadron was only hours away… a flight I missed due to getting into a little disagreement with the XO. We never saw it coming… after 40 years we were thrown into the midst of a war, forced to fight in vipers that were classed as museum pieces. And I had my first real taste of combat.
None of us could have been prepared for this… but we were here… My hands were still shaking from the adrenaline of landing two linked vipers, thus saving the life of one of my best friends… it was the least I could do… after all… I killed his brother. I reach for the velvet box one more time, taking the ring and slipping it on again, to remind me not only of what I had lost… but of all that was still left to live for.
A ring…. A simple silver band… something so small for the significance it carries. It was to have been his, but the Lords saw fit to punish my lack of judgment by taking him from me… I still vividly recall the day of the funeral.
As I stood in front of my locker, fastening the final clasp on the sash of my dress uniform, there sat the box on the shelf. It was exactly where it had been since I bought it three months before… but now it seemed to stare right at me. As if my hands were acting of their own will I reached for the box, taking the ring from its velvet cage, placing it securely on my left thumb… a reminder that he should have been at my side.
There it remained throughout the day, and throughout the next several weeks… until the day I set foot on the Galactica for the first time. That day the ring returned to its velvet box on the shelf in my locker, where it sat for two years. Until today…
Why today? 24 hours ago everything was as it should be… The Galactica was to be decommissioned… we were all hanging in limbo, waiting for out next postings… I was returning to Picon… the final flight with my squadron was only hours away… a flight I missed due to getting into a little disagreement with the XO. We never saw it coming… after 40 years we were thrown into the midst of a war, forced to fight in vipers that were classed as museum pieces. And I had my first real taste of combat.
None of us could have been prepared for this… but we were here… My hands were still shaking from the adrenaline of landing two linked vipers, thus saving the life of one of my best friends… it was the least I could do… after all… I killed his brother. I reach for the velvet box one more time, taking the ring and slipping it on again, to remind me not only of what I had lost… but of all that was still left to live for.
Activation
This little drabble i wrote for a challenge WAY back just after the mini aired. It was a callenge issued to step into the mind of any character at a critical point... this is what happened.
With a nervous laugh, I get to my feet. I am now locked in a dark corridor with a total stranger… and from the look of his uniform, a powerful stranger. Adama… that’s what he said his name was…
Why is that name so familiar… I keep my distance from his type, we could not have met before. Being an arms dealer tends to make one suspicious of anyone in uniform… it’s a hazard of the job.
My ears are still ringing from the sounds of the explosion as I steady myself against the wall… “Do you know who you are” I hear the voice break through… but it is not his voice... he is talking to someone outside. There is no one in here but us… Of course I know who I am, I think to myself, what an absurd question. “Are you sure…” the voice echoes again.
It is not just a voice... but a chorus of voices… calling to something deep within.
Memories begin to flood in… memories I could never have experienced… things I could not know. The voices... they subside… I begin to understand… I must get out of here… the storm… I am no longer the man I once thought myself to be. I am so much more.
Humanity is inferior. I must get off this station. It is interfering with my signal… Adama can get me out… then he can be disposed of…
He asks if there is another way out…
I simply reply with a smile “Yeah…”
With a nervous laugh, I get to my feet. I am now locked in a dark corridor with a total stranger… and from the look of his uniform, a powerful stranger. Adama… that’s what he said his name was…
Why is that name so familiar… I keep my distance from his type, we could not have met before. Being an arms dealer tends to make one suspicious of anyone in uniform… it’s a hazard of the job.
My ears are still ringing from the sounds of the explosion as I steady myself against the wall… “Do you know who you are” I hear the voice break through… but it is not his voice... he is talking to someone outside. There is no one in here but us… Of course I know who I am, I think to myself, what an absurd question. “Are you sure…” the voice echoes again.
It is not just a voice... but a chorus of voices… calling to something deep within.
Memories begin to flood in… memories I could never have experienced… things I could not know. The voices... they subside… I begin to understand… I must get out of here… the storm… I am no longer the man I once thought myself to be. I am so much more.
Humanity is inferior. I must get off this station. It is interfering with my signal… Adama can get me out… then he can be disposed of…
He asks if there is another way out…
I simply reply with a smile “Yeah…”
Secrets - Muse Topic
What is the one thing about yourself that you don't want anyone to ever know?
Worthless…
Useless…
A mistake…
An accident…
Those are the words that paint my childhood. My mother never wanted me. And she made sure that I knew it. Ironically it would have been better had I been a boy. I know it sounds almost sexist to think that, but in this case it was the truth. I remember at an early age… when we used to go on outings… my mother would dress me in boys clothes… she kept my hair cropped short and never called me by the name my father had given me. Instead she referred to me by my middle name, which was so generic no one questioned. Until I was six everyone thought I was a boy… and she was happy. Then I started school and I was suddenly forced to be a little girl… The called my by my first name, sent me to the girls washroom… and I questioned her… That’s when it started.
My Mother never wanted a daughter.
Girls are so clumsy… she used to tell me. And so many times she was right, falls down the stairs that left bumps and bruises for weeks, accidentally bumping the piano hard enough that the cover crashed down on my fingers… running into a door, breaking my nose for the third time… Even the doctors suspected how clumsy I was, but before I could say anything we would move away and it would start all over… new doctors, new hospitals and a clumsy little girl.
Mom always wanted a son.
Maybe she would be proud of me now; I ended up in the military just as she wanted for her son… I can out fly anyone in the fleet; no-one can beat me on the firing range… I drink, smoke cigars and bullshit with the best. I run with the big dogs, take your money at the card table and break hearts and bodies in the bedroom… My theory in life is to kick ass and ask questions later.
Everything I know I learned from her… She made me into a prodigal son to be proud of. Except she made one mistake…
I am a woman, and proud of it.
I will not let the past rear its ugly head again… I can’t afford to dwell on what once was. I need to be strong now more than ever and to allow myself to luxuriate in self pity would leave me weak. I can’t be weak; it would jeopardize the remnants of my civilization. Too many people count in me to be strong. So the past will stay where it belongs… Dead and buried.
Kara Thrace
Battlestar Galactica
468 words
Worthless…
Useless…
A mistake…
An accident…
Those are the words that paint my childhood. My mother never wanted me. And she made sure that I knew it. Ironically it would have been better had I been a boy. I know it sounds almost sexist to think that, but in this case it was the truth. I remember at an early age… when we used to go on outings… my mother would dress me in boys clothes… she kept my hair cropped short and never called me by the name my father had given me. Instead she referred to me by my middle name, which was so generic no one questioned. Until I was six everyone thought I was a boy… and she was happy. Then I started school and I was suddenly forced to be a little girl… The called my by my first name, sent me to the girls washroom… and I questioned her… That’s when it started.
My Mother never wanted a daughter.
Girls are so clumsy… she used to tell me. And so many times she was right, falls down the stairs that left bumps and bruises for weeks, accidentally bumping the piano hard enough that the cover crashed down on my fingers… running into a door, breaking my nose for the third time… Even the doctors suspected how clumsy I was, but before I could say anything we would move away and it would start all over… new doctors, new hospitals and a clumsy little girl.
Mom always wanted a son.
Maybe she would be proud of me now; I ended up in the military just as she wanted for her son… I can out fly anyone in the fleet; no-one can beat me on the firing range… I drink, smoke cigars and bullshit with the best. I run with the big dogs, take your money at the card table and break hearts and bodies in the bedroom… My theory in life is to kick ass and ask questions later.
Everything I know I learned from her… She made me into a prodigal son to be proud of. Except she made one mistake…
I am a woman, and proud of it.
I will not let the past rear its ugly head again… I can’t afford to dwell on what once was. I need to be strong now more than ever and to allow myself to luxuriate in self pity would leave me weak. I can’t be weak; it would jeopardize the remnants of my civilization. Too many people count in me to be strong. So the past will stay where it belongs… Dead and buried.
Kara Thrace
Battlestar Galactica
468 words
Sleepless Night - Definitely Adult
Written for a friend, she gave the topic, I wrote
It was just past 0200 and she still couldn’t sleep. The rhythmic footfalls on the deck were doing nothing to ease the restless energy that was keeping her awake. She had hoped going for a run would be enough to be able to achieve even a restless sleep; after all it had worked many times before in the past weeks. This time, however, it wasn't nightmares that were keeping her awake. It was anticipation.
After over a year out of the cockpit, tomorrow she was back in the cockpit. Mid day CAP… It had been far too long, much longer than she would have liked. So damned much had happened. Most of which she would rather forget. Feelings, emotions she shouldn’t have had… still shouldn’t have. She shook her head. This was not going to help her present sleepless situation, and if she didn't sleep soon, Cottle wouldn’t give her the clearance come morning.
Kara needed to do something, and she needed to do it now. Maybe, just maybe a trip down to the flight deck would help. She'd spent many nights down there in the past, if it had worked before why not this time? She asked herself, knowing that the true answer was she was just too wound up to wait till morning. Altering her route she pushed on towards the hanger deck, jogging along the high causeway, the vipers lined up in their bays below. Her eyes lit up as she approached bay 14 on Deck C… There, right where it should be, in her preferred spot, looking sleek and strong. Her viper… She couldn’t see the name plate, but she could see the tail number.
Twenty three steps, one turn and down a half flight of stairs and she was standing just off the shoulder of its wing, halfway to the deck. The feral grin on her face was evident even to her as she took in the nameplate, every detail as it should be. It looked as though it had been just recently done, prepared just for her return. She should have known though, the chief had said he would look out for her… and making her bird stand out like it was new off the line was just his way of doing it. She stepped over the rail, one foot briefly touching the wing as she climbed into the cockpit.
Sinking down into the seat of the Mark VII felt… Gods it was hard to even put a description on it. The foam of the seat had just the right give, designed to protect back and neck from the effects of a high G launch, it had a tendency to sink just a little when not in the air, the soft leather cupping the body like a gentle embrace.
She closed her eyes and ran her hand over the console, remembering, knowing what each button was for, as well as just how hard you needed to push each one, and when… Her hand ghosted over the controls, seeking out the startup sequence, not pressing but just hovering. She could almost feel the vibrations as she recalled the feel of the Dual Voram engines coming to life, the high Voram kicking in seconds later. The intense power at her fingertips… Her hand instinctively shifted to the flight stick, closing around the perfectly formed base, fingers relaxed against the controls.
In her mind she ran over dogfight after dogfight, the feel of pushing this magnificent creature to its limits… every shake and pull brought on by high G maneuvers… her first thought was that it was better than sex… followed by her body responding with a very clear 'Yeah could use some of that too…' A smirk played across her lips. It wouldn’t be the first time… and just maybe it would wind her down enough to let her sleep. A glance around told her this end of the deck was empty… third shift was working at the far end on rebuilding another viper…. Closing her eyes she sunk back into the chair, the hand not on the controls coming up to brush over her breast, lightly squeezing, her thumb brushing over the nipple, already hard from the slight chill in the air. She let her fingers trace light circles around the nipple, brushing across every so often, drawing out the sensation… just like the controls of the viper, she knew all the right places, the right sequence… she relinquished her hold on the flight stick and brought her other hand up to her other breast, mirroring the actions. Slow, light touches, over and over… hands gently squeezing….mmmm yes… that was definitely the startup sequence…. She could feel the heat coiling in her, thighs aching, begging for contact… not yet...
Hands sliding down ver her stomach, she fond the hem of her shirt, slipping one hand beneath, sliding further up, pushing her bra up over the top of her breast, half exposing her to anyone who might have been passing on the catwalk overhead. She didn't care… all that mattered was that her thumb and forefinger found the nipple, pinching lightly.
Her breath was already rapid, heavy, punctuated by soft whimpers as she let herself get lost in the sensation… She'd never done anything halfway… pleasuring herself was no exception… she always drew it out to its fullest.
The hand at the hem of her shirt slipped lower, brushing over her thigh, teasing, taunting, the ache becoming near unbearable as it shifted between slightly parted thighs, brushing back and forth over the fabric of her shorts that kept eager fingers from pushing into her. Instead she continued to stroke over the material, lightly squeezing the mound of flesh, palm pushing hard against her clothed crotch, building the tension higher and higher until she could feel the damp head through the fabric. Definitely time…
She brought the hand up as her other pushed the other side of her bra up, fully exposing her chest as she turned attentions to the other breast. Finding the waistband of her running shorts she slipped her hand beneath, fingers seeking out the heat like missiles, rocketing straight to her core. She shifted, sinking lower to let her knees fall open, two fingers locking on, sinking in… the fleshy pad at the base of her thumb settling against her clit, each movement brushing it just enough…
Hips bucked lightly against her hand, breathing hard…. The sound of metal banging on metal down the deck masking the throaty moans, body sweat slick and trembling, she pushed on. Just a little more… the ache turning to a pulse… a burn… threatening to sear her alive from the inside out. She could almost see spots behind her eyes, a sensation so close to G-LOC… and she broke, biting back a scream, so intense she bit into her lip, breaking the skin.
She was still a moment, chest heaving to catch her breath as she straightened her clothes. It was a few moments before she could move. She knew she needed to get up and go now, sleep already threatening to carry her away. It took every effort she cold muster to haul herself up out of the cockpit and make her way back up the stairs to the catwalk. Continuing to the nearest hatch she glanced back, just able to see the nose of her bird before disappearing through the hatch. Maybe it wasn't so crazy for her to love a machine after all…
It was just past 0200 and she still couldn’t sleep. The rhythmic footfalls on the deck were doing nothing to ease the restless energy that was keeping her awake. She had hoped going for a run would be enough to be able to achieve even a restless sleep; after all it had worked many times before in the past weeks. This time, however, it wasn't nightmares that were keeping her awake. It was anticipation.
After over a year out of the cockpit, tomorrow she was back in the cockpit. Mid day CAP… It had been far too long, much longer than she would have liked. So damned much had happened. Most of which she would rather forget. Feelings, emotions she shouldn’t have had… still shouldn’t have. She shook her head. This was not going to help her present sleepless situation, and if she didn't sleep soon, Cottle wouldn’t give her the clearance come morning.
Kara needed to do something, and she needed to do it now. Maybe, just maybe a trip down to the flight deck would help. She'd spent many nights down there in the past, if it had worked before why not this time? She asked herself, knowing that the true answer was she was just too wound up to wait till morning. Altering her route she pushed on towards the hanger deck, jogging along the high causeway, the vipers lined up in their bays below. Her eyes lit up as she approached bay 14 on Deck C… There, right where it should be, in her preferred spot, looking sleek and strong. Her viper… She couldn’t see the name plate, but she could see the tail number.
Twenty three steps, one turn and down a half flight of stairs and she was standing just off the shoulder of its wing, halfway to the deck. The feral grin on her face was evident even to her as she took in the nameplate, every detail as it should be. It looked as though it had been just recently done, prepared just for her return. She should have known though, the chief had said he would look out for her… and making her bird stand out like it was new off the line was just his way of doing it. She stepped over the rail, one foot briefly touching the wing as she climbed into the cockpit.
Sinking down into the seat of the Mark VII felt… Gods it was hard to even put a description on it. The foam of the seat had just the right give, designed to protect back and neck from the effects of a high G launch, it had a tendency to sink just a little when not in the air, the soft leather cupping the body like a gentle embrace.
She closed her eyes and ran her hand over the console, remembering, knowing what each button was for, as well as just how hard you needed to push each one, and when… Her hand ghosted over the controls, seeking out the startup sequence, not pressing but just hovering. She could almost feel the vibrations as she recalled the feel of the Dual Voram engines coming to life, the high Voram kicking in seconds later. The intense power at her fingertips… Her hand instinctively shifted to the flight stick, closing around the perfectly formed base, fingers relaxed against the controls.
In her mind she ran over dogfight after dogfight, the feel of pushing this magnificent creature to its limits… every shake and pull brought on by high G maneuvers… her first thought was that it was better than sex… followed by her body responding with a very clear 'Yeah could use some of that too…' A smirk played across her lips. It wouldn’t be the first time… and just maybe it would wind her down enough to let her sleep. A glance around told her this end of the deck was empty… third shift was working at the far end on rebuilding another viper…. Closing her eyes she sunk back into the chair, the hand not on the controls coming up to brush over her breast, lightly squeezing, her thumb brushing over the nipple, already hard from the slight chill in the air. She let her fingers trace light circles around the nipple, brushing across every so often, drawing out the sensation… just like the controls of the viper, she knew all the right places, the right sequence… she relinquished her hold on the flight stick and brought her other hand up to her other breast, mirroring the actions. Slow, light touches, over and over… hands gently squeezing….mmmm yes… that was definitely the startup sequence…. She could feel the heat coiling in her, thighs aching, begging for contact… not yet...
Hands sliding down ver her stomach, she fond the hem of her shirt, slipping one hand beneath, sliding further up, pushing her bra up over the top of her breast, half exposing her to anyone who might have been passing on the catwalk overhead. She didn't care… all that mattered was that her thumb and forefinger found the nipple, pinching lightly.
Her breath was already rapid, heavy, punctuated by soft whimpers as she let herself get lost in the sensation… She'd never done anything halfway… pleasuring herself was no exception… she always drew it out to its fullest.
The hand at the hem of her shirt slipped lower, brushing over her thigh, teasing, taunting, the ache becoming near unbearable as it shifted between slightly parted thighs, brushing back and forth over the fabric of her shorts that kept eager fingers from pushing into her. Instead she continued to stroke over the material, lightly squeezing the mound of flesh, palm pushing hard against her clothed crotch, building the tension higher and higher until she could feel the damp head through the fabric. Definitely time…
She brought the hand up as her other pushed the other side of her bra up, fully exposing her chest as she turned attentions to the other breast. Finding the waistband of her running shorts she slipped her hand beneath, fingers seeking out the heat like missiles, rocketing straight to her core. She shifted, sinking lower to let her knees fall open, two fingers locking on, sinking in… the fleshy pad at the base of her thumb settling against her clit, each movement brushing it just enough…
Hips bucked lightly against her hand, breathing hard…. The sound of metal banging on metal down the deck masking the throaty moans, body sweat slick and trembling, she pushed on. Just a little more… the ache turning to a pulse… a burn… threatening to sear her alive from the inside out. She could almost see spots behind her eyes, a sensation so close to G-LOC… and she broke, biting back a scream, so intense she bit into her lip, breaking the skin.
She was still a moment, chest heaving to catch her breath as she straightened her clothes. It was a few moments before she could move. She knew she needed to get up and go now, sleep already threatening to carry her away. It took every effort she cold muster to haul herself up out of the cockpit and make her way back up the stairs to the catwalk. Continuing to the nearest hatch she glanced back, just able to see the nose of her bird before disappearing through the hatch. Maybe it wasn't so crazy for her to love a machine after all…
Shattered Glass - Muse Topic
For a time i was a member of a writing group that had you adopt a character and write on specific topics... here are some of he results.
Character Name: Kara Thrace
Origin: Battlestar Galactica
Prompt: August 2006 prompt: Picture 1 (Broken glass)
Word Count: 460
Rating: PG
Shattered glass is everywhere… every turn every corner. I know instinctively its not really there… not here on this desolate rock. But, back home on its namesake… the last memories I have of the once beautiful cities are blocks and blocks of shattered glass…
Very little else was disturbed. It was eerie. Great cities now ghost towns. No people in sight, no birds, no bodies… just the sound of shattered glass crunching beneath your feet with every step.
It’s a strange irony that the image of shattered glass fits us so well now. We're a shattered people, torn and divided. Scattered across this strange new world… Not long ago we were united, searching for a common goal. Then we settled, lost focus, lost the drive. That’s when they came back and broke us once more. Scattering pieces of a once vast civilization to the winds…
Now we can't even look at one another… some have chosen to throw in the towel, to give their lives over to servitude. Others have taken to the hills and fight with every fiber of their being. Then there are those of us who are caught in between… neither collaborator no resistance… just prisoners.
Each day is going through the motions, just existing. Wondering if this will be the day my death warrant is signed, if today is the day I will tell him no and he will listen. Or will I kill him again? Its become a morbid ritual. At least once I week I kill him now… I don't even have to think about it anymore; yesterday it was with a butter knife at the dinner table. I know he can't die, not really. They just download him into a new body and he comes back again. He doesn’t even mention it, just carries on with trying to convince me this is where I belong, that he loves me… despite the fact he's died at my hands at least five or six times now.
Its almost become a way to cope, my only protest…
I look in the mirror…the glass is intact, but the woman it reflects is shattered. I don't know who I am anymore. He's breaking me down piece by piece… his love is so strong… so unconditional. I don't know how to deal with that. Instinctively I know he's a machine, but then again, he's more human than some people I've called a friend. More human than other's I've loved… Has he succeeded? Do I hate him so much because he's made me love him?
Outside the window the legions of centurions march along the street below. I don't hear the grinding of gears or the clamor of the metal… all I can hear is the crunching of shattered glass.
Character Name: Kara Thrace
Origin: Battlestar Galactica
Prompt: August 2006 prompt: Picture 1 (Broken glass)
Word Count: 460
Rating: PG
Shattered glass is everywhere… every turn every corner. I know instinctively its not really there… not here on this desolate rock. But, back home on its namesake… the last memories I have of the once beautiful cities are blocks and blocks of shattered glass…
Very little else was disturbed. It was eerie. Great cities now ghost towns. No people in sight, no birds, no bodies… just the sound of shattered glass crunching beneath your feet with every step.
It’s a strange irony that the image of shattered glass fits us so well now. We're a shattered people, torn and divided. Scattered across this strange new world… Not long ago we were united, searching for a common goal. Then we settled, lost focus, lost the drive. That’s when they came back and broke us once more. Scattering pieces of a once vast civilization to the winds…
Now we can't even look at one another… some have chosen to throw in the towel, to give their lives over to servitude. Others have taken to the hills and fight with every fiber of their being. Then there are those of us who are caught in between… neither collaborator no resistance… just prisoners.
Each day is going through the motions, just existing. Wondering if this will be the day my death warrant is signed, if today is the day I will tell him no and he will listen. Or will I kill him again? Its become a morbid ritual. At least once I week I kill him now… I don't even have to think about it anymore; yesterday it was with a butter knife at the dinner table. I know he can't die, not really. They just download him into a new body and he comes back again. He doesn’t even mention it, just carries on with trying to convince me this is where I belong, that he loves me… despite the fact he's died at my hands at least five or six times now.
Its almost become a way to cope, my only protest…
I look in the mirror…the glass is intact, but the woman it reflects is shattered. I don't know who I am anymore. He's breaking me down piece by piece… his love is so strong… so unconditional. I don't know how to deal with that. Instinctively I know he's a machine, but then again, he's more human than some people I've called a friend. More human than other's I've loved… Has he succeeded? Do I hate him so much because he's made me love him?
Outside the window the legions of centurions march along the street below. I don't hear the grinding of gears or the clamor of the metal… all I can hear is the crunching of shattered glass.
Two Poems
Skin Deep
Beauty is skin deep
Hear it over and over
But it’s a lie
Does anyone really care what’s under the surface
Does anyone look?
Nobody wants to take the time
Nobody really cares
Nobody tries to understand the ones who aren’t beautiful
They just don’t exist
Theo only see what I see
The monster in the mirror
Abomination
Unacceptable
Just not good enough
If they did look inside
They would see I feel
I hurt
I cry
I am still human.
Erosion
Everyone’s rock
Holding up he weight of the world
Shouldering tears and triumph
Promise and pain
Frustration
Strong as stone
Worn by time.
Tears and pain etch away at my surface
Like a waterfall eats the rock
Chipping away
Until the stone crumbles
And nothing is left
Beauty is skin deep
Hear it over and over
But it’s a lie
Does anyone really care what’s under the surface
Does anyone look?
Nobody wants to take the time
Nobody really cares
Nobody tries to understand the ones who aren’t beautiful
They just don’t exist
Theo only see what I see
The monster in the mirror
Abomination
Unacceptable
Just not good enough
If they did look inside
They would see I feel
I hurt
I cry
I am still human.
Erosion
Everyone’s rock
Holding up he weight of the world
Shouldering tears and triumph
Promise and pain
Frustration
Strong as stone
Worn by time.
Tears and pain etch away at my surface
Like a waterfall eats the rock
Chipping away
Until the stone crumbles
And nothing is left
Stranger in a Strange Land - Chapter 11 FF/BSG Fic
Reluctantly, he let his hand slip away from her waist. She was going to tell him what he'd feared; that his touch was unwelcome now they were partners rather than just friends, that they had to keep a line between them now they were working together. He kept his eyes closed, not wanting to see hers as she told him. He forced himself to keep thinking of the only upside; they could at least still be friends. There was too much between them - too much shared - for them to stop being that, surely?
She looked away at first, afraid he may not want to hear what she had to say. Words weren't her strong point, but he hat to know.. she had to know where they stood... She took a careful breath, staying in his embrace.
"I fell in love with a friend once. Turns out he had fallen for me too, but we never told one another. There was too much between us back then, things that over time became less and less relevant but we still let it hang between us. We focused everything on our friendship... each of us trying only once to take it beyond that point... but we always hit the same walls. In time we both moved on, found other people to love... and in doing that drove a rift between us that was uncrossable. "
He listened to her draw breath, ready to start talking ... felt his heart sinking when he opened his eyes only to see her turn her head away, avoiding his gaze. He fought the urge to turn away himself, knowing that he might never get to hold her this close again when she turned him away.
He listened to her talk, the words making her move slightly against him, telling her of her friend ... her love ... that she'd let pass by, that had drifted away. He could understand that; he knew just from the way he felt when he looked at her that he'd be risking everything to tell her he wanted more than friendship, that it would destroy him if he'd said anything and she'd said no.
Then she turned back to him, hazel-green eyes open, everything about her bare in them. And she said it. He knew that she was braver than sin ... but she actually said it. He couldn't keep a slight tremble out of his arms as he looked at her, too stunned ... too happy ... to even think of breathing. He smiled, softly at first, then wider. Wonder evident in his voice, he spoke softly. "Darlin' .... Kara, don't you see? I'm already yours. You found me, dyin' in some ratpit from too much booze and too much death... and you saved me. You made me whole again ... you fly like an angel, fight like the devil, and touch me like you're made out of pure fire. Fallin' for you? I fell for you hard that night we shared a bathtub and more; I've been walkin' round here like a bison on eggshells, tryin' to avoid driving you away by askin' too much..."
She took a nervous breath, turning her face to look at him; watching his face... knowing he was likely thinking the worst. "The biggest mistake I made was never really telling him how i felt, because i was afraid to take a chance, that it would ruin what we had if we tried for something more... I won't make that mistake again." Her voice wavered a little and she took a calming breath before continuing. "I think I'm falling in love with you Mal Reynolds... And I don't want to stop falling."
She had to fight back the urge to cry... his words touching her, dispelling the fear she had held that he would push her away, that she would have to live with him day after day knowing he wasn't interested... but instead he stole her breath when he spoke.
No words could have described the way she felt at that moment... even if she could have spoken them. So she did the only thing she knew felt right. She brought her hands to cup his face, pulling him in to a long, emotion packed kiss that left her trembling in its wake.
When she kissed him, it was as if she were pouring everything she was, everything she felt into it... and he found himself responding in kind, unable to even think, let alone try and speak. His arms moved up from her waist, wrapping around her, trapping her arms between them as he held her close.
The breadth of emotion she was throwing at him left him literally breathless, unable to do anything but gaze into her eyes when she broke the kiss off, everything else about who they were and where they were lost to him.
It took a moment for her to catch her breath, a playful smile spreading across her face, eyes locked onto his. "You love me? You really love me?" She asked in an almost singsong voice. "There's no take backs you know.."
It was childish in a way, true. but she needed to hear him say it... that would make it real...
He wasn't one to ever back down - unless he needed to. "Take backs? Why would I want a take back?" He leaned against her, tipping her head back a little so that their noses touched, his mouth almost on top of hers. "I love you, Kara Thrace."
The playful grin that had been on her face was replaced with a smile that lit up her eyes. Just hearing him say it, so confidently.... it soothed away old aching memories and wrapped her in a comfortable blanket of warm feelings. "I love you too, Malcom Reynolds..." She whispered softly before closing the distance between them, her lips brushing his once more.
He loved that playful grin of hers. Every time he saw it, it warmed him through, shining like a beacon in the dark ... but it wasn't anything like that slow, glorious smile that replaced it. And she loved him. Him, Malcolm Reynolds. That was the last thing he thought of as he felt her lips move to brush against his, soft and open. He knew one thing for certain; he was never going to get tired of kissing her.
She sighed softly against his mouth, savouring the kiss as he pressed her back against the wall. They had come so far in so little time together. Everything just felt right with him...
For weeks, he'd been on tenterhooks around her, not knowing whether their first hectic, passionate days together had been just a once off, a reaction to stress and too much trauma ... or maybe something more. Now, with his arms around her, lips moving softly against his... everything meant more. Each kiss felt like the first, shaking him down to his boot soles.
She groaned softly, kissing him long and slow. Lords but she'd missed this... they had backed off of one another when they'd fallen into getting Serenity ready to fly... but it had been painful. She'd ached every moment wanting to touch him again. But she didn't want to drive him away. She'd done that far too many times already. She needed this. needed him... the rest of the 'verse be damned.
He'd been scared of pushing her away; with no-one else in the 'verse left who gave a damn, she'd become the only solid thing left, the person he could count on. They'd worked together on the Serenity, talked the days away, inches from touching but always a little held back; he'd thought she was keeping her distance, but truth was, they'd both paused, unsure of where the other was. Well, he knew where he was, where he wanted to be; right here with her. When the kiss finally broke, he moved to keep one hand on her cheek, softly brushing her skin with his thumb as he stared at her for a second, smiling softly; then he bent to kiss her again, tasting those soft, red lips again.
She pulled back from the kiss slowly, swallowing hard. "How about... we forget lunch..." She brought her hand to his cheek and kissed him again, a little deeper, hungrier.
He watched her swallow... she looked so tender, so ... vulnerable. The kiss did more than shake him to his boots; it made his blood turn to fire. He felt the folded cuff of his shirt slide a little more towards his elbow as he stroked her cheek again, and when the kiss finally ended... he sighed softly, and said the first thing came to mind. "I think... I forgot everything else in the verse but you first instant you kissed me... and I want to do a whole lot more than kiss you..."
"Then what are you waiting for..." She said, her voice low, gravelly with emotion. "its been to damned long..."
He didn't hesitate; jaw set, he started moving quickly towards his quarters, one hand catching hers to tow her along with him. "I thought... you might not want to be more than friends. Didn't want to drive you away. Now... wu de ma, I ain't never lettin' you go."
She gripped his hand following him. "Damned right you're not..." She grinned as they reached his quarters. She took hold of the ladder and climbed down, dropping the last few rungs as she jumped down.
He dropped straight down, feet slowing his impact; he couldn't be bothered to wait long enough to climb safely. His knees bent as he hit the deck, but he used the momentum, turning to catch her in his arms, mouth moving to seek hers out hungrily, the intensity of his kiss a sharp contrast to the gentle touch of his arms.
She groaned, pressing into him, returning the kiss hungrily, aching for him, Gods they'd wasted so much time dancing around already... she had been a little scared of the intensity of her feelings for him at first, but when they had both pulled back... that had scared her even more... She needed this. Needed him... her hands found their way to his shirt, fisting into the fabric as she kissed him long and hard.
He kept his arms around her, too intent to shake, much though he felt like he was trembling inside. every taste of her, every touch had seemed like drinking paradise in human form. She was soft through the fabric of her shift, soft and warm. He'd told himself he could do without her touch if she just wanted friendship and no more; he'd been lying like Bester in heat. He couldn't do without her any more than he could do without air.
He tugged her shirt up out of the britches she wore, pulling her braces down so that the shirt hung lose around her hips. He kept kissing her, not bothering with undoing her buttons; instead, he simply gathered two large handfuls of her shirt and started lifting it in one piece, up towards her shoulders.
She pulled back, lifting her arms so he could pull the shirt off before her hands went back to his shirt, tugging at the last buttons before shoving it off his shoulders, fingers tracing down newly exposed skin as her mouth south his once more.
He let the shirt flutter to the ground unnoticed, his mouth moving down to kiss softly along the line of her jaw and down along the side of her neck, nuzzling softly as his hands moved slowly, fingertips tracing along her shoulders and down her back.
"Gods... I've missed you..." she whispered, burying her face into his neck, letting her hands roam over shoulders, gently gripping biceps before moving to his back, down to his waist.
He could feel her hands exploring him gently, same way he was hers... none of the frenzied urgency of their first time. He traced over the skin of her back, feeling the muscles shift underneath as she moved; he ghosted his hands around her hips, tracing the line of her pants before moving up over her stomach, his lips only leaving her neck once ... to whisper "Wanted you so much..."
She moved to slip a hand beneath his chin, lifting his mouth to hers once more. "You've got me..." She breathed against his lips before kissing him slow and sensual.
Her mouth was hot and hungry against his, and he couldn't help but respond in kind; one of his hands moved up to her hair, keeping her mouth pressed tight against his as he walked her backwards towards the bunk, following her down onto it when the bunk hit the back of her knees.
The weight of him over her wrapped her in a warmth she couldn't even begin to compare. Her hands ghosted down his back settling over his hips as her fingertips traced along the waistband of his trousers, barely dipping below as her mouth moved to his neck, trailing down to the hollow of his throat.
When she started to move down towards his neck he moved his mouth up, kissing the tip of her nose, then slowly along the line of her forehead and across her temple towards her ear, where he paused to gently nibble gently on her earlobe. Not wanting to take his eyes off her, he moves his hands slowly down to bring her knee up so that he could start tugging her boot free, lips never leaving her body.
She slipped her foot from her boot, chuckling a little when she heard it hit ground a short distance away. She brought her bootless foot to hook over his leg, pressing her hips to his with slow, deliberate movements.
He moaned softly as she pulled him close, stroking herself against him with slow, even movements that sent the blood singing through his ears. He paused for a second, trying to breathe, then moved his hips slowly against hers, pressing down against her through the fabric of their remaining clothes, his mouth moving to let him nip softly at the nape of her neck.
The feel of him rubbing against her sent a jolt of delicious heat surging through her, her heart racing as she responded back with a slow, erotic grind of her hips. She managed to work her other foot free of its boot using the side of the bed, before wrapping her other foot over his leg.
She was wrapped around him, legs and arms pulling him tight. He had to stop to rub his feet together, working his boots to drop away; one, he heard clatter to the deck; the other shot off somewhere, landing with the sound of breaking glass... but whatever that was, it wasn't important. He reached up and titled her chin back, letting him kiss his way down from the point of her chin to the notch at the base of her throat as his hips started to move again, spiralling inside the circle her legs created, rubbing deliciously against her.
"Gods Mal..." she gasped, her body arcing beneath his, pressing against him. She shifted her weight, rolling him so she was sitting astride him, hands on his shoulders as she ground her hips against him, bucking and grinding slowly as she nipped at his lip.
Oh, he liked that. He found himself grinning faintly, same way he did when he could feel that winning hand come through; lord, but she was sweeter than any victory in battle, any hooch he'd ever tasted. Seeing as she'd put him so perfectly in place, he had to oblige; he let his hips move automatically, slowly rolling and grinding up against her as he ghosted his hands up to tug her bra free, letting her fill his hands with the soft gentle warmth of her breasts, palms and fingers slowly moving.
A low, sensual moan escaped her and she ground down against him harder, feeling his need for her even through the layers of clothing... gods but she felt so damned good, the way he touched... just right... and gods yes… right there... She leaned forward slightly, sweat damp hair tumbling over her face as she continued to work her hips against his, trembling with each movement now, so frakkin' close...
He moved his head up to kiss her softly, her hair thick around their faces as he arched his back; the kiss tasted of her, hot and smoky-sweet, but the movement pulled him away from her, and he couldn't live with that. He sank back against the bed, pressing up against her as she rocked against him, his breath coming in short, sharp gasps. He swept his palms slowly along the underside of her breasts, then ghosted his thumbs across her nipples, lightly at first, then more heavily, slowly rolling and teasing them.
"Oh... oh gods...'' she gasped, her body quivering as she pressed against him, trying to keep the rhythm steady as she shattered, waves of raw pleasure coursing over her as she gripped his shoulders.
He watched her as she broke, hands moving to sweep around to her back, pulling her down against him. He cradled her in his arms as she shuddered, his arms shaking from the surge of pleasure she'd sent through him. Her bare skin was felt like hot electricity against his chest, his lips seeking hers out automatically.
"Love you..."' she gasped, nuzzling his neck, hands trailing over his chest. Gently she rolled her finger around one nipple, her mouth finding his neck, biting lightly, then suckling the reddened skin.
He moved his hand up, catching and twirling a lock of her hair between thumb and forefinger before stroking gently along the line of her ear. "I love you, too... more'n this ship, even..." he whispered, then hissed softly as she bit his neck. Even that sent a ripple through him, emanating out from her sharp white teeth. He moved to grasp her hips, lifting them up a little from him so that he could slip one hand between them, starting to work at the fastenings on her britches.
She braced her hands against his shoulders, forcing herself upwards, sitting back up to give him access to her pants even as she began to work on his, slowly unfastening them
For some reason, he couldn't help chuckling softly as their hands worked in tandem. "Always did love a woman who looked good in a pair of britches... and I ain't never seen one look as good as you." He grinned at her, eyes shining as he tugged her up by her waistband, slipping her pants over her hips slowly.
She grinned, rolling off of him as she kicked the pants off, flinging them away with a kick, resulting in another crash against the floor.
He bucked his hips up off the bed, pulling his pants and shorts off together in a few jerked motions, kicking his legs until they fell against the deck. "Good thing I wasn't wearing a fightin' iron..." he muttered before rolling onto his side, slipping an arm around her. "And now the only thing protectin' your virtue is some feminine undergarments..." he muttered, bending his head to nip at the base of her throat, stinging the skin a flushing red.
She groaned, arching against him as his mouth found her neck once more. "I.. I think you can take care of that... can't you?" She asked, slow and teasing, her hand guiding his to her hip.
He let his hand rest on her hip for a few seconds, fingers slowly stroking. "It might take me a few moments... I might get all distracted..." he murmured against her neck, his hand slipping under the elastic of her panties, running down along the notch of her hip to slip completely inside that last piece of clothing, his fingers slowly stroking along her core.
A low moan escaped her, hips pressing onto his hand as he touched her, already slick and hot, aching for his touch. "Gods...." she gasped, breathless.
He ran his fingers slowly back and forth along her, feeling them glide over her skin already slick for him. "You have any idea how good you feel?" he whispered, having to pull his mouth back from her neck so that he could get back some smidgen of control. He leant his forehead against hers, his arm moving around her shoulders to keep her close. He kept moving his fingers slowly along her until her eyes flickered open. He stared into those perfect hazel-green eyes of hers, and slipped a finger gently inside her, stroking softly.
Her fingers instantly dug into his shoulders, her hips pushing against his hand. "Oh... Oh gods Mal..." She groaned, small tremors already working through her as she ground against his hand, her breath short and ragged.
"Maybe ... maybe we should let you ... keep those feminine undergarments, and just... do this a lot." He couldn't help the wide, feral grin on his face at the sight of her, mouth open and eyes shut as she groaned. He kept moving his hand gently, finally slipping a second finger in too work with the first; the feeling of her clamping around his fingers... dear lord in heaven.
She gasped, pressing her hips down onto his hand, hips writhing against him, "gods Mal... Want you..." her breath hitched as her body trembled, tightening around his fingers.
He slipped his fingers out of her slowly. He had to go slowly; if he didn't, then he'd lose more than just the power of thought. He ran his fingers back to the elastic again, slowly working her panties down her legs until he could drop them onto the floor; that done, he shifted, moving to lie against her as his arms moved around her again. He kissed his way slowly back up her jaw then paused, trembling. He looked at her for a second, eyes soft and open, then without saying a word started to slowly slip into her as he kissed her softly again, breath sighing out of him.
She met his eyes, holding his gaze as he pressed into her, the sensation making her skin tingle. She fought the urge to close her eyes, instead she watched, arching against him as he sunk into her, filling her, more than just physically, emotionally.... gods but she needed him....
She rose up around him like a healing balm, until he felt as if his entire being had been enfolded in soft warmth. She was so utterly perfect... felt so utterly perfect... and her eyes were enough to swallow him whole, leave him floating in perfect bliss. "Love you..." he whispered... the only words he seemed to be capable of.
Her response was a breathless, feather-soft brush of her lip over his, fingers tangling in his hair as she moved with him, arching and grinding her hips to his, savouring each movement.
The feather-light kisses seemed perfect for the moment... he started matching her soft, open mouthed kisses with his own, moving himself slowly against her, every movement letting them arch together, move together, grind together.
She wrapped her legs over his, fingers gripping hold of his shoulders again as she strained against him, so damned close to breaking....she gasped sharply, her voice sinking into a low, sensual moan.
He shivered as she gasped sharply in his ear; he could feel himself racing towards the edge with every movement, and the way she strained up against him, moved with him and against him... he felt his head come to rest next to hers, gasping sharply as he started to shake. "Kara..." he whispered...
"Gods… love you..." She moaned, breaking over the edge, a wash of raw pleasure coursing over her, fingers digging into his shoulders, her face buried against his neck to muffle the screams that escaped her.
He shuddered hard against her, losing all sense of rhythm as he broke, growling out a deep moan of satisfied pleasure, his arms pulling her up tight against him. He heard her say she loved him again... but it was seconds before he had the breath to answer her, his vision drawn down to red-flecked darkness for a few seconds. "Love you ... too. Love you ... so much..." He found himself rocking her gently in his arms, her legs still wrapped tightly around him.
She looked up at him, her hand brushing over his cheek. "So where do we go from here, Captain?" She gave him a soft, sly smile, content to just rest in his arms for now...
She looked away at first, afraid he may not want to hear what she had to say. Words weren't her strong point, but he hat to know.. she had to know where they stood... She took a careful breath, staying in his embrace.
"I fell in love with a friend once. Turns out he had fallen for me too, but we never told one another. There was too much between us back then, things that over time became less and less relevant but we still let it hang between us. We focused everything on our friendship... each of us trying only once to take it beyond that point... but we always hit the same walls. In time we both moved on, found other people to love... and in doing that drove a rift between us that was uncrossable. "
He listened to her draw breath, ready to start talking ... felt his heart sinking when he opened his eyes only to see her turn her head away, avoiding his gaze. He fought the urge to turn away himself, knowing that he might never get to hold her this close again when she turned him away.
He listened to her talk, the words making her move slightly against him, telling her of her friend ... her love ... that she'd let pass by, that had drifted away. He could understand that; he knew just from the way he felt when he looked at her that he'd be risking everything to tell her he wanted more than friendship, that it would destroy him if he'd said anything and she'd said no.
Then she turned back to him, hazel-green eyes open, everything about her bare in them. And she said it. He knew that she was braver than sin ... but she actually said it. He couldn't keep a slight tremble out of his arms as he looked at her, too stunned ... too happy ... to even think of breathing. He smiled, softly at first, then wider. Wonder evident in his voice, he spoke softly. "Darlin' .... Kara, don't you see? I'm already yours. You found me, dyin' in some ratpit from too much booze and too much death... and you saved me. You made me whole again ... you fly like an angel, fight like the devil, and touch me like you're made out of pure fire. Fallin' for you? I fell for you hard that night we shared a bathtub and more; I've been walkin' round here like a bison on eggshells, tryin' to avoid driving you away by askin' too much..."
She took a nervous breath, turning her face to look at him; watching his face... knowing he was likely thinking the worst. "The biggest mistake I made was never really telling him how i felt, because i was afraid to take a chance, that it would ruin what we had if we tried for something more... I won't make that mistake again." Her voice wavered a little and she took a calming breath before continuing. "I think I'm falling in love with you Mal Reynolds... And I don't want to stop falling."
She had to fight back the urge to cry... his words touching her, dispelling the fear she had held that he would push her away, that she would have to live with him day after day knowing he wasn't interested... but instead he stole her breath when he spoke.
No words could have described the way she felt at that moment... even if she could have spoken them. So she did the only thing she knew felt right. She brought her hands to cup his face, pulling him in to a long, emotion packed kiss that left her trembling in its wake.
When she kissed him, it was as if she were pouring everything she was, everything she felt into it... and he found himself responding in kind, unable to even think, let alone try and speak. His arms moved up from her waist, wrapping around her, trapping her arms between them as he held her close.
The breadth of emotion she was throwing at him left him literally breathless, unable to do anything but gaze into her eyes when she broke the kiss off, everything else about who they were and where they were lost to him.
It took a moment for her to catch her breath, a playful smile spreading across her face, eyes locked onto his. "You love me? You really love me?" She asked in an almost singsong voice. "There's no take backs you know.."
It was childish in a way, true. but she needed to hear him say it... that would make it real...
He wasn't one to ever back down - unless he needed to. "Take backs? Why would I want a take back?" He leaned against her, tipping her head back a little so that their noses touched, his mouth almost on top of hers. "I love you, Kara Thrace."
The playful grin that had been on her face was replaced with a smile that lit up her eyes. Just hearing him say it, so confidently.... it soothed away old aching memories and wrapped her in a comfortable blanket of warm feelings. "I love you too, Malcom Reynolds..." She whispered softly before closing the distance between them, her lips brushing his once more.
He loved that playful grin of hers. Every time he saw it, it warmed him through, shining like a beacon in the dark ... but it wasn't anything like that slow, glorious smile that replaced it. And she loved him. Him, Malcolm Reynolds. That was the last thing he thought of as he felt her lips move to brush against his, soft and open. He knew one thing for certain; he was never going to get tired of kissing her.
She sighed softly against his mouth, savouring the kiss as he pressed her back against the wall. They had come so far in so little time together. Everything just felt right with him...
For weeks, he'd been on tenterhooks around her, not knowing whether their first hectic, passionate days together had been just a once off, a reaction to stress and too much trauma ... or maybe something more. Now, with his arms around her, lips moving softly against his... everything meant more. Each kiss felt like the first, shaking him down to his boot soles.
She groaned softly, kissing him long and slow. Lords but she'd missed this... they had backed off of one another when they'd fallen into getting Serenity ready to fly... but it had been painful. She'd ached every moment wanting to touch him again. But she didn't want to drive him away. She'd done that far too many times already. She needed this. needed him... the rest of the 'verse be damned.
He'd been scared of pushing her away; with no-one else in the 'verse left who gave a damn, she'd become the only solid thing left, the person he could count on. They'd worked together on the Serenity, talked the days away, inches from touching but always a little held back; he'd thought she was keeping her distance, but truth was, they'd both paused, unsure of where the other was. Well, he knew where he was, where he wanted to be; right here with her. When the kiss finally broke, he moved to keep one hand on her cheek, softly brushing her skin with his thumb as he stared at her for a second, smiling softly; then he bent to kiss her again, tasting those soft, red lips again.
She pulled back from the kiss slowly, swallowing hard. "How about... we forget lunch..." She brought her hand to his cheek and kissed him again, a little deeper, hungrier.
He watched her swallow... she looked so tender, so ... vulnerable. The kiss did more than shake him to his boots; it made his blood turn to fire. He felt the folded cuff of his shirt slide a little more towards his elbow as he stroked her cheek again, and when the kiss finally ended... he sighed softly, and said the first thing came to mind. "I think... I forgot everything else in the verse but you first instant you kissed me... and I want to do a whole lot more than kiss you..."
"Then what are you waiting for..." She said, her voice low, gravelly with emotion. "its been to damned long..."
He didn't hesitate; jaw set, he started moving quickly towards his quarters, one hand catching hers to tow her along with him. "I thought... you might not want to be more than friends. Didn't want to drive you away. Now... wu de ma, I ain't never lettin' you go."
She gripped his hand following him. "Damned right you're not..." She grinned as they reached his quarters. She took hold of the ladder and climbed down, dropping the last few rungs as she jumped down.
He dropped straight down, feet slowing his impact; he couldn't be bothered to wait long enough to climb safely. His knees bent as he hit the deck, but he used the momentum, turning to catch her in his arms, mouth moving to seek hers out hungrily, the intensity of his kiss a sharp contrast to the gentle touch of his arms.
She groaned, pressing into him, returning the kiss hungrily, aching for him, Gods they'd wasted so much time dancing around already... she had been a little scared of the intensity of her feelings for him at first, but when they had both pulled back... that had scared her even more... She needed this. Needed him... her hands found their way to his shirt, fisting into the fabric as she kissed him long and hard.
He kept his arms around her, too intent to shake, much though he felt like he was trembling inside. every taste of her, every touch had seemed like drinking paradise in human form. She was soft through the fabric of her shift, soft and warm. He'd told himself he could do without her touch if she just wanted friendship and no more; he'd been lying like Bester in heat. He couldn't do without her any more than he could do without air.
He tugged her shirt up out of the britches she wore, pulling her braces down so that the shirt hung lose around her hips. He kept kissing her, not bothering with undoing her buttons; instead, he simply gathered two large handfuls of her shirt and started lifting it in one piece, up towards her shoulders.
She pulled back, lifting her arms so he could pull the shirt off before her hands went back to his shirt, tugging at the last buttons before shoving it off his shoulders, fingers tracing down newly exposed skin as her mouth south his once more.
He let the shirt flutter to the ground unnoticed, his mouth moving down to kiss softly along the line of her jaw and down along the side of her neck, nuzzling softly as his hands moved slowly, fingertips tracing along her shoulders and down her back.
"Gods... I've missed you..." she whispered, burying her face into his neck, letting her hands roam over shoulders, gently gripping biceps before moving to his back, down to his waist.
He could feel her hands exploring him gently, same way he was hers... none of the frenzied urgency of their first time. He traced over the skin of her back, feeling the muscles shift underneath as she moved; he ghosted his hands around her hips, tracing the line of her pants before moving up over her stomach, his lips only leaving her neck once ... to whisper "Wanted you so much..."
She moved to slip a hand beneath his chin, lifting his mouth to hers once more. "You've got me..." She breathed against his lips before kissing him slow and sensual.
Her mouth was hot and hungry against his, and he couldn't help but respond in kind; one of his hands moved up to her hair, keeping her mouth pressed tight against his as he walked her backwards towards the bunk, following her down onto it when the bunk hit the back of her knees.
The weight of him over her wrapped her in a warmth she couldn't even begin to compare. Her hands ghosted down his back settling over his hips as her fingertips traced along the waistband of his trousers, barely dipping below as her mouth moved to his neck, trailing down to the hollow of his throat.
When she started to move down towards his neck he moved his mouth up, kissing the tip of her nose, then slowly along the line of her forehead and across her temple towards her ear, where he paused to gently nibble gently on her earlobe. Not wanting to take his eyes off her, he moves his hands slowly down to bring her knee up so that he could start tugging her boot free, lips never leaving her body.
She slipped her foot from her boot, chuckling a little when she heard it hit ground a short distance away. She brought her bootless foot to hook over his leg, pressing her hips to his with slow, deliberate movements.
He moaned softly as she pulled him close, stroking herself against him with slow, even movements that sent the blood singing through his ears. He paused for a second, trying to breathe, then moved his hips slowly against hers, pressing down against her through the fabric of their remaining clothes, his mouth moving to let him nip softly at the nape of her neck.
The feel of him rubbing against her sent a jolt of delicious heat surging through her, her heart racing as she responded back with a slow, erotic grind of her hips. She managed to work her other foot free of its boot using the side of the bed, before wrapping her other foot over his leg.
She was wrapped around him, legs and arms pulling him tight. He had to stop to rub his feet together, working his boots to drop away; one, he heard clatter to the deck; the other shot off somewhere, landing with the sound of breaking glass... but whatever that was, it wasn't important. He reached up and titled her chin back, letting him kiss his way down from the point of her chin to the notch at the base of her throat as his hips started to move again, spiralling inside the circle her legs created, rubbing deliciously against her.
"Gods Mal..." she gasped, her body arcing beneath his, pressing against him. She shifted her weight, rolling him so she was sitting astride him, hands on his shoulders as she ground her hips against him, bucking and grinding slowly as she nipped at his lip.
Oh, he liked that. He found himself grinning faintly, same way he did when he could feel that winning hand come through; lord, but she was sweeter than any victory in battle, any hooch he'd ever tasted. Seeing as she'd put him so perfectly in place, he had to oblige; he let his hips move automatically, slowly rolling and grinding up against her as he ghosted his hands up to tug her bra free, letting her fill his hands with the soft gentle warmth of her breasts, palms and fingers slowly moving.
A low, sensual moan escaped her and she ground down against him harder, feeling his need for her even through the layers of clothing... gods but she felt so damned good, the way he touched... just right... and gods yes… right there... She leaned forward slightly, sweat damp hair tumbling over her face as she continued to work her hips against his, trembling with each movement now, so frakkin' close...
He moved his head up to kiss her softly, her hair thick around their faces as he arched his back; the kiss tasted of her, hot and smoky-sweet, but the movement pulled him away from her, and he couldn't live with that. He sank back against the bed, pressing up against her as she rocked against him, his breath coming in short, sharp gasps. He swept his palms slowly along the underside of her breasts, then ghosted his thumbs across her nipples, lightly at first, then more heavily, slowly rolling and teasing them.
"Oh... oh gods...'' she gasped, her body quivering as she pressed against him, trying to keep the rhythm steady as she shattered, waves of raw pleasure coursing over her as she gripped his shoulders.
He watched her as she broke, hands moving to sweep around to her back, pulling her down against him. He cradled her in his arms as she shuddered, his arms shaking from the surge of pleasure she'd sent through him. Her bare skin was felt like hot electricity against his chest, his lips seeking hers out automatically.
"Love you..."' she gasped, nuzzling his neck, hands trailing over his chest. Gently she rolled her finger around one nipple, her mouth finding his neck, biting lightly, then suckling the reddened skin.
He moved his hand up, catching and twirling a lock of her hair between thumb and forefinger before stroking gently along the line of her ear. "I love you, too... more'n this ship, even..." he whispered, then hissed softly as she bit his neck. Even that sent a ripple through him, emanating out from her sharp white teeth. He moved to grasp her hips, lifting them up a little from him so that he could slip one hand between them, starting to work at the fastenings on her britches.
She braced her hands against his shoulders, forcing herself upwards, sitting back up to give him access to her pants even as she began to work on his, slowly unfastening them
For some reason, he couldn't help chuckling softly as their hands worked in tandem. "Always did love a woman who looked good in a pair of britches... and I ain't never seen one look as good as you." He grinned at her, eyes shining as he tugged her up by her waistband, slipping her pants over her hips slowly.
She grinned, rolling off of him as she kicked the pants off, flinging them away with a kick, resulting in another crash against the floor.
He bucked his hips up off the bed, pulling his pants and shorts off together in a few jerked motions, kicking his legs until they fell against the deck. "Good thing I wasn't wearing a fightin' iron..." he muttered before rolling onto his side, slipping an arm around her. "And now the only thing protectin' your virtue is some feminine undergarments..." he muttered, bending his head to nip at the base of her throat, stinging the skin a flushing red.
She groaned, arching against him as his mouth found her neck once more. "I.. I think you can take care of that... can't you?" She asked, slow and teasing, her hand guiding his to her hip.
He let his hand rest on her hip for a few seconds, fingers slowly stroking. "It might take me a few moments... I might get all distracted..." he murmured against her neck, his hand slipping under the elastic of her panties, running down along the notch of her hip to slip completely inside that last piece of clothing, his fingers slowly stroking along her core.
A low moan escaped her, hips pressing onto his hand as he touched her, already slick and hot, aching for his touch. "Gods...." she gasped, breathless.
He ran his fingers slowly back and forth along her, feeling them glide over her skin already slick for him. "You have any idea how good you feel?" he whispered, having to pull his mouth back from her neck so that he could get back some smidgen of control. He leant his forehead against hers, his arm moving around her shoulders to keep her close. He kept moving his fingers slowly along her until her eyes flickered open. He stared into those perfect hazel-green eyes of hers, and slipped a finger gently inside her, stroking softly.
Her fingers instantly dug into his shoulders, her hips pushing against his hand. "Oh... Oh gods Mal..." She groaned, small tremors already working through her as she ground against his hand, her breath short and ragged.
"Maybe ... maybe we should let you ... keep those feminine undergarments, and just... do this a lot." He couldn't help the wide, feral grin on his face at the sight of her, mouth open and eyes shut as she groaned. He kept moving his hand gently, finally slipping a second finger in too work with the first; the feeling of her clamping around his fingers... dear lord in heaven.
She gasped, pressing her hips down onto his hand, hips writhing against him, "gods Mal... Want you..." her breath hitched as her body trembled, tightening around his fingers.
He slipped his fingers out of her slowly. He had to go slowly; if he didn't, then he'd lose more than just the power of thought. He ran his fingers back to the elastic again, slowly working her panties down her legs until he could drop them onto the floor; that done, he shifted, moving to lie against her as his arms moved around her again. He kissed his way slowly back up her jaw then paused, trembling. He looked at her for a second, eyes soft and open, then without saying a word started to slowly slip into her as he kissed her softly again, breath sighing out of him.
She met his eyes, holding his gaze as he pressed into her, the sensation making her skin tingle. She fought the urge to close her eyes, instead she watched, arching against him as he sunk into her, filling her, more than just physically, emotionally.... gods but she needed him....
She rose up around him like a healing balm, until he felt as if his entire being had been enfolded in soft warmth. She was so utterly perfect... felt so utterly perfect... and her eyes were enough to swallow him whole, leave him floating in perfect bliss. "Love you..." he whispered... the only words he seemed to be capable of.
Her response was a breathless, feather-soft brush of her lip over his, fingers tangling in his hair as she moved with him, arching and grinding her hips to his, savouring each movement.
The feather-light kisses seemed perfect for the moment... he started matching her soft, open mouthed kisses with his own, moving himself slowly against her, every movement letting them arch together, move together, grind together.
She wrapped her legs over his, fingers gripping hold of his shoulders again as she strained against him, so damned close to breaking....she gasped sharply, her voice sinking into a low, sensual moan.
He shivered as she gasped sharply in his ear; he could feel himself racing towards the edge with every movement, and the way she strained up against him, moved with him and against him... he felt his head come to rest next to hers, gasping sharply as he started to shake. "Kara..." he whispered...
"Gods… love you..." She moaned, breaking over the edge, a wash of raw pleasure coursing over her, fingers digging into his shoulders, her face buried against his neck to muffle the screams that escaped her.
He shuddered hard against her, losing all sense of rhythm as he broke, growling out a deep moan of satisfied pleasure, his arms pulling her up tight against him. He heard her say she loved him again... but it was seconds before he had the breath to answer her, his vision drawn down to red-flecked darkness for a few seconds. "Love you ... too. Love you ... so much..." He found himself rocking her gently in his arms, her legs still wrapped tightly around him.
She looked up at him, her hand brushing over his cheek. "So where do we go from here, Captain?" She gave him a soft, sly smile, content to just rest in his arms for now...
Stranger in a Strange Land - Chapter 10 FF/BSG Fic
Four days. Just four days after Mal kicked bester off Serenity and hired Kaylee they were in the air... Serenity was actually in the air. Kara was in her element' for now. She knew deep down they needed another pilot, she and Mal were partners, and they worked together. Which meant that there was no one around to have Serenity ready if things didn't go so well.
It wasn't as though they intended to get into scrapes and tight spots, but they were known to happen... and things like that had a habit of following her around. For the moment, however she was content to be flying again.
Kara'd lifted Serenity off the ground gentle as a bird ... one that didn't make those vigorous flapping motions and flap into things on takeoff, too. He'd got them a decent contract, shipping agri supplies out to New Horizons. Of course, that's what the paperwork called the planet, now trying to be all respectable like now it was supposed to be on the alliance flick, but the man hiring him had been happily calling the place "Crotch." No pretensions ... much more his sort of place. Of course, there was under alliance control and under alliance control; the agri supplies would be useful, but the black market template constructor stashed inside one of their bulkheads, that'd get them a pretty penny more.
Still, they were up. Flying. Flying free, in fact; he'd spent a fair amount of time up on the bridge, staring out the window. He'd seen more worlds than he'd liked during the war, all of them in a bad way, but he'd never had the chance to just sit and watch. Of course, Kara was off busy a lot of the time too; Kaylee knew more about engines and technical stuff than Mal cared to think about, and Kara was helping her out. He'd been banished from the engine room after trying to help .... how did he know that bit didn't like being prodded with a screwdriver?
Still, she was up on the bridge now, as they were getting near some gravitational eddy they'd need to move the ship round, and he had a fancy to watch her work. So, he'd done a little work in the kitchen, then set off for the bridge, clutching two steaming mugs, a third waiting in the galley for Kaylee whenever she was ready. Of course, he'd had to trade in a few belongings to get it... but he had a feeling that as his crew was two thirds female, having enough of the best powdered hot drinking chocolate he could find aboard to last three months would help keep things running happy.
The hatch to the bridge was open, so he stepped carefully over the raised step. "Hey there, darlin'. Thought you could do with this, seein' as you're going to be doin' the hard work for a while..."
She looked over and couldn't hide the broad smile that spread across her face. With all the work they'd been doing on Serenity, they'd hardly had but a minute to spend in one another's company. And what little time they did manage usually found one of them sound asleep before they could even talk. She took the offered mug, her smile growing wider. "Gods this is just what I need..." She took a sip, groaning a little.
She had to keep her attention on the controls, despite her making it look effortless. "We've got a large gravity well a few hundred clicks ahead... not an uncommon anomaly... but they can be tricky." She gave him a reassuring smile. "They can also be very handy... how'd you like to get to Crotch a day early and on half the fuel?" her smile widened into a feral grin, eyes sparkling.
Dear lords, but whenever she groaned... He sat down quickly in the co-pilot seat, trying to avoid spilling hot chocolate down himself in the process. "I thought you could do with a drop. Got to look after my gi... " He tried to cover, frantically. "Crew, after all..."
"So those old nav charts we paid out for are already makin' themselves useful? Or..." He gave her a quirky half-grin. "Or is that the intrepid Starbuck talking of usin' her secret pilot knowledge to bounce us well ahead and confound everyone with her derring-do?" He didn't have much idea what derring-do was, but it was in one of those old talking films and sounded like something she'd do.
So, a day early and half the fuel... that'd be a nice bit of extra cash to throw in the pot, and it'd get them a good reputation. He sipped from his mug, and grinned. "Saving us time and money... not bad. Not to bad at all, darlin'."
"Well... then I suggest you finish up that mug and strap in. I'll show you a little trick." She drank a good portion of her own mug before reaching for the comm. "Buckle yourself in somewhere Kaylee... it might get a touch bumpy in the next few minutes." She finished her mug and set it down on the floor.
He polished off his chocolate in fairly short order, watching her work as much as he did the view out of the window. He wedged his empty mug against a convenient control, and asked "So will this little trick be as impressive as the last?"
He strapped himself in, and couldn't help saying "So when you say bumpy ... you mean..."
"I think you'll be fairly impressed..." She gave him a saucy wink. "And by bumpy I mean hang on tight. Going to use a little trick I learned at the academy, with small craft its used as an emergency measure, can shake them right apart. Big ships like battlestars, doesn't work, their mass is just too great, but Serenity, she's just the right size." She commented as she maneuvered Serenity so that they were heading straight into the gravity well, picking up speed.
He chuckled at her wink... and then realized what she was saying. "Ta ma de..." He shifted his feet under the console and braced against the support struts as the gravity well started to seize hold of the ship.
"Kara, this is our nice new ship here... you break it and kill me, I'm going to be a mite upset..." Well, this was going to be interesting ... and just how sure was she of the ships mass. He drew a breath in, and waited for the ride to get bumpy. Well ... bumpier.
She kept focused as they neared the edge, reversing the thrusters just enough to hold position, letting Serenity swing around the center of the well, shaking, but holding up well. After the ship began to swing around faster, she adjsuted the thrusters, spinning round and punching out, the small ship rocketing back out into space, cruising at nearly three times the speed they had been going previously, with thrusters cut. She looked over ad Mal and gave him a wink. "There ya go..." She couldn't help an amused chuckle at the expression on his face.
He was awful glad that he didn't suffer from motion sickness, the way the ship had bounced and juddered around on the way into the well... and back out again. Even so, he couldn't help feeling that his eyes were about to fall out of the front of his head.
"That's some real fancy flying' .... Are you going to be doing that a lot?" Her grin was infectious, and he couldn't help grinning back. "After all, you already make my life excitin' even when you aren't playin' with the vast and immutable forces of nature..."
"Only if you want me to... and we're not carrying something thats likely to make a mess..." She laughed, setting the ship on autopilot as it rode out the momentum of the slingshot. "Likely won't need to draw on the engines for a good half a day.
"That's good ... it'll give Kaylee more timr to shake 'em down, make sure she knows what makes this old girl tick." He dropped on hand on her shoulder, squeezing gently. "You're one hell of a pilot, Kara. There anythin' you aren't good at?"
"Lots of things... but... nothing that matters really..." She gave him a smile, a hint of sadness in her eyes for a brief moment. "What say we enjoy the rest of the day... cook up something to eat and just be lazy a couple hours..."
He saw a flicker in her eyes, a quick look that reminded him of things he'd rather forget. "That sounds mighty fine to me, Kara." He wasn't quite sure what to do ... but if you can't do somethin' right, to something right now. Or somesuch. He tugged her up out of the chair easily, one arm going around her waist. "A little celebration sounds like just the thing."
She laughed as he tugged her up and swept her into an almost embrace. She took the liberty of pushing her limit and leaning in to plant a kiss on his cheek as they walked to the galley. "So... you gonna teach me how to cook?"
"Well now, that depends..." He shot her a quick grin, unable to help himself after that electric touch to his cheek. "What're you gonna teach me?" He bent and kissed her lightly on the forehead, steering them around the junction of the corridor towards the Galley
The easy banter and gentle affection was warm and comforting, familiar.. yet not. Thing had rarely ever come this easy... "What do you want me to teach you." She couldn't hide the almost seductive purr in her voice.
Lord, but he loved that voice, that throaty almost-purr. "What I'd like..." He had top stop himself short. Friends, remember? "Why don't you let me think on that one a while?"
"Alright... but don't make me wait too long..."
He stopped, one hand on the hatch trigger to the galley, his other arm snugged around that perfect waist. He kept her moving a little ahead of him, but didn't trigger the hatch straight away, instead just looking at her.
She turned to look at him, inquisitive eyes trying to read his expression. Lords but he was handsome... not to mention fun loving, kind hearted... and damned sexy... she had to fight the thoughts of the few times they had been together back when they first met up... before they had bought serenity... they had both pulled back then... but the feel of his hands on her still haunted her and made her ache and gods she had to stop thinking about it or he would know exactly what she was thinking...
"I don't like you lookin' sad, darlin'..." He was practically whispering, Kara tucked against him as the galley hatch turned the end of the corridor into a quiet alcove. She was so damned beautiful. "Angel like you shouldn't never have to look sad..." He couldn't help himself. She could push away if she wanted. He leaned his head forward to rest against hers, forehead to forehead; then, he dropped his head a little further and kissed her softly, keeping his touch gentle.
Her hands came up against his shoulders, hesitating a moment before slipping around his neck. She kissed him back, slow and gentle, her heart racing but her actions were tender.
He felt her hands slip around his neck, the touch achingly familiar from before, when they'd been together back on that dismal little world. He let go ofthe hatch control and let his hand instead float across to her, a finger stroking first through the hair of her temple and then down along the line of her ear, the kiss achingly sweet.
She let out a soft, contented sigh, letting herself sink into the kiss, savoring, each light brush of his lips over hers leaving her wanting more, the gentle caress of his hands making her want to scream at him to take her... If she could only admit to herself that she actually felt something more then friendship for him she just might have...
His hand ghosted down, stroking the side of her neck softly before moving down along the line of her back, touch just heavy enough to be felt through her clothes, his breath coming in short, soft noises as he let the kiss linger.
She tried to fight the emotion surging within her... tried to fight the fears of past relationships gone wrong... of losing someone she let get too close... She had fallen for her best friend and it ended up devastating their relationship... not because they gave in to that new level... but because they both fought it, tooth and nail, trying to hand on to something good, just in case better didn't work out... she couldn't go through that again... she couldn't take losing another friend. She pulled away slowly, her forehead pressed to his as she fought to get her breathing under control. "Mal... There... there's something I need to tell you..."
It wasn't as though they intended to get into scrapes and tight spots, but they were known to happen... and things like that had a habit of following her around. For the moment, however she was content to be flying again.
Kara'd lifted Serenity off the ground gentle as a bird ... one that didn't make those vigorous flapping motions and flap into things on takeoff, too. He'd got them a decent contract, shipping agri supplies out to New Horizons. Of course, that's what the paperwork called the planet, now trying to be all respectable like now it was supposed to be on the alliance flick, but the man hiring him had been happily calling the place "Crotch." No pretensions ... much more his sort of place. Of course, there was under alliance control and under alliance control; the agri supplies would be useful, but the black market template constructor stashed inside one of their bulkheads, that'd get them a pretty penny more.
Still, they were up. Flying. Flying free, in fact; he'd spent a fair amount of time up on the bridge, staring out the window. He'd seen more worlds than he'd liked during the war, all of them in a bad way, but he'd never had the chance to just sit and watch. Of course, Kara was off busy a lot of the time too; Kaylee knew more about engines and technical stuff than Mal cared to think about, and Kara was helping her out. He'd been banished from the engine room after trying to help .... how did he know that bit didn't like being prodded with a screwdriver?
Still, she was up on the bridge now, as they were getting near some gravitational eddy they'd need to move the ship round, and he had a fancy to watch her work. So, he'd done a little work in the kitchen, then set off for the bridge, clutching two steaming mugs, a third waiting in the galley for Kaylee whenever she was ready. Of course, he'd had to trade in a few belongings to get it... but he had a feeling that as his crew was two thirds female, having enough of the best powdered hot drinking chocolate he could find aboard to last three months would help keep things running happy.
The hatch to the bridge was open, so he stepped carefully over the raised step. "Hey there, darlin'. Thought you could do with this, seein' as you're going to be doin' the hard work for a while..."
She looked over and couldn't hide the broad smile that spread across her face. With all the work they'd been doing on Serenity, they'd hardly had but a minute to spend in one another's company. And what little time they did manage usually found one of them sound asleep before they could even talk. She took the offered mug, her smile growing wider. "Gods this is just what I need..." She took a sip, groaning a little.
She had to keep her attention on the controls, despite her making it look effortless. "We've got a large gravity well a few hundred clicks ahead... not an uncommon anomaly... but they can be tricky." She gave him a reassuring smile. "They can also be very handy... how'd you like to get to Crotch a day early and on half the fuel?" her smile widened into a feral grin, eyes sparkling.
Dear lords, but whenever she groaned... He sat down quickly in the co-pilot seat, trying to avoid spilling hot chocolate down himself in the process. "I thought you could do with a drop. Got to look after my gi... " He tried to cover, frantically. "Crew, after all..."
"So those old nav charts we paid out for are already makin' themselves useful? Or..." He gave her a quirky half-grin. "Or is that the intrepid Starbuck talking of usin' her secret pilot knowledge to bounce us well ahead and confound everyone with her derring-do?" He didn't have much idea what derring-do was, but it was in one of those old talking films and sounded like something she'd do.
So, a day early and half the fuel... that'd be a nice bit of extra cash to throw in the pot, and it'd get them a good reputation. He sipped from his mug, and grinned. "Saving us time and money... not bad. Not to bad at all, darlin'."
"Well... then I suggest you finish up that mug and strap in. I'll show you a little trick." She drank a good portion of her own mug before reaching for the comm. "Buckle yourself in somewhere Kaylee... it might get a touch bumpy in the next few minutes." She finished her mug and set it down on the floor.
He polished off his chocolate in fairly short order, watching her work as much as he did the view out of the window. He wedged his empty mug against a convenient control, and asked "So will this little trick be as impressive as the last?"
He strapped himself in, and couldn't help saying "So when you say bumpy ... you mean..."
"I think you'll be fairly impressed..." She gave him a saucy wink. "And by bumpy I mean hang on tight. Going to use a little trick I learned at the academy, with small craft its used as an emergency measure, can shake them right apart. Big ships like battlestars, doesn't work, their mass is just too great, but Serenity, she's just the right size." She commented as she maneuvered Serenity so that they were heading straight into the gravity well, picking up speed.
He chuckled at her wink... and then realized what she was saying. "Ta ma de..." He shifted his feet under the console and braced against the support struts as the gravity well started to seize hold of the ship.
"Kara, this is our nice new ship here... you break it and kill me, I'm going to be a mite upset..." Well, this was going to be interesting ... and just how sure was she of the ships mass. He drew a breath in, and waited for the ride to get bumpy. Well ... bumpier.
She kept focused as they neared the edge, reversing the thrusters just enough to hold position, letting Serenity swing around the center of the well, shaking, but holding up well. After the ship began to swing around faster, she adjsuted the thrusters, spinning round and punching out, the small ship rocketing back out into space, cruising at nearly three times the speed they had been going previously, with thrusters cut. She looked over ad Mal and gave him a wink. "There ya go..." She couldn't help an amused chuckle at the expression on his face.
He was awful glad that he didn't suffer from motion sickness, the way the ship had bounced and juddered around on the way into the well... and back out again. Even so, he couldn't help feeling that his eyes were about to fall out of the front of his head.
"That's some real fancy flying' .... Are you going to be doing that a lot?" Her grin was infectious, and he couldn't help grinning back. "After all, you already make my life excitin' even when you aren't playin' with the vast and immutable forces of nature..."
"Only if you want me to... and we're not carrying something thats likely to make a mess..." She laughed, setting the ship on autopilot as it rode out the momentum of the slingshot. "Likely won't need to draw on the engines for a good half a day.
"That's good ... it'll give Kaylee more timr to shake 'em down, make sure she knows what makes this old girl tick." He dropped on hand on her shoulder, squeezing gently. "You're one hell of a pilot, Kara. There anythin' you aren't good at?"
"Lots of things... but... nothing that matters really..." She gave him a smile, a hint of sadness in her eyes for a brief moment. "What say we enjoy the rest of the day... cook up something to eat and just be lazy a couple hours..."
He saw a flicker in her eyes, a quick look that reminded him of things he'd rather forget. "That sounds mighty fine to me, Kara." He wasn't quite sure what to do ... but if you can't do somethin' right, to something right now. Or somesuch. He tugged her up out of the chair easily, one arm going around her waist. "A little celebration sounds like just the thing."
She laughed as he tugged her up and swept her into an almost embrace. She took the liberty of pushing her limit and leaning in to plant a kiss on his cheek as they walked to the galley. "So... you gonna teach me how to cook?"
"Well now, that depends..." He shot her a quick grin, unable to help himself after that electric touch to his cheek. "What're you gonna teach me?" He bent and kissed her lightly on the forehead, steering them around the junction of the corridor towards the Galley
The easy banter and gentle affection was warm and comforting, familiar.. yet not. Thing had rarely ever come this easy... "What do you want me to teach you." She couldn't hide the almost seductive purr in her voice.
Lord, but he loved that voice, that throaty almost-purr. "What I'd like..." He had top stop himself short. Friends, remember? "Why don't you let me think on that one a while?"
"Alright... but don't make me wait too long..."
He stopped, one hand on the hatch trigger to the galley, his other arm snugged around that perfect waist. He kept her moving a little ahead of him, but didn't trigger the hatch straight away, instead just looking at her.
She turned to look at him, inquisitive eyes trying to read his expression. Lords but he was handsome... not to mention fun loving, kind hearted... and damned sexy... she had to fight the thoughts of the few times they had been together back when they first met up... before they had bought serenity... they had both pulled back then... but the feel of his hands on her still haunted her and made her ache and gods she had to stop thinking about it or he would know exactly what she was thinking...
"I don't like you lookin' sad, darlin'..." He was practically whispering, Kara tucked against him as the galley hatch turned the end of the corridor into a quiet alcove. She was so damned beautiful. "Angel like you shouldn't never have to look sad..." He couldn't help himself. She could push away if she wanted. He leaned his head forward to rest against hers, forehead to forehead; then, he dropped his head a little further and kissed her softly, keeping his touch gentle.
Her hands came up against his shoulders, hesitating a moment before slipping around his neck. She kissed him back, slow and gentle, her heart racing but her actions were tender.
He felt her hands slip around his neck, the touch achingly familiar from before, when they'd been together back on that dismal little world. He let go ofthe hatch control and let his hand instead float across to her, a finger stroking first through the hair of her temple and then down along the line of her ear, the kiss achingly sweet.
She let out a soft, contented sigh, letting herself sink into the kiss, savoring, each light brush of his lips over hers leaving her wanting more, the gentle caress of his hands making her want to scream at him to take her... If she could only admit to herself that she actually felt something more then friendship for him she just might have...
His hand ghosted down, stroking the side of her neck softly before moving down along the line of her back, touch just heavy enough to be felt through her clothes, his breath coming in short, soft noises as he let the kiss linger.
She tried to fight the emotion surging within her... tried to fight the fears of past relationships gone wrong... of losing someone she let get too close... She had fallen for her best friend and it ended up devastating their relationship... not because they gave in to that new level... but because they both fought it, tooth and nail, trying to hand on to something good, just in case better didn't work out... she couldn't go through that again... she couldn't take losing another friend. She pulled away slowly, her forehead pressed to his as she fought to get her breathing under control. "Mal... There... there's something I need to tell you..."
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